Moms have a lot on their plates every day.
Parents have a lot on their plates and rarely get a break because they have to juggle numerous tasks throughout the day, such as washing the kids’ sticky hands and faces, folding their laundry, making sure they have breakfast and lunch, and getting them ready for school.
No matter how hard they try, there’s bound to be some kind of disaster waiting around the corner, like a glass of milk knocked over, a toy you accidentally stepped on, or a stain somewhere.
Few mothers can afford the luxury of a short shower before turning in or taking some time for themselves.
Some things we take for granted as parents are touched upon in a recent piece by Heather Duckworth, a mother who has been through it all.
The messes kids make as they mature before our eyes into the persons we’ve always imagined they’ll become are an integral part of that process.
It’s important to remember that our children will look back on the messes we cleaned up as adults and use those memories as the greatest testament to the childhood we gave them, so it’s worth the effort to find the joy in the midst of the chaos.
Regrettably, not all women get to experience the turmoil and clutter that children create.
Likewise, not all parents are able to enjoy the joy that children bring into their lives.
The popular post by Heather titled “The Blue Stain” resonated with many new and expectant mothers.
Heather’s heart started pounding as she scrubbed the grout her daughter had formed with the slime, remembering the disaster she had to remove all those years ago.
After a long day of running around after her two-year-old triplets and four-year-old older brother, picking up toys, and making sure no one got hurt in the piles of laundry she couldn’t finish that day, this mother would reflect, “My hands were full, but so was my heart.”
Before turning in for the night, Heather and her two sons danced to the radio while they tidied up the playroom.
Nobody could have predicted that it would be the last time they laughed so hard for a while.
It was just as she was settling in for a good night’s sleep herself that she heard one of the lads remark, “Uh, Oh,” and she saw the huge blue stain that would haunt her dreams forever.
The pen one of the triplets was holding burst in his grasp, spraying ink everywhere. His hands, face, and pajamas were all blue, giving the impression that the tiny boy was a smurf.
While she watched, Heather felt like a bad mother and began to get angry.
She hadn’t been angry with her son, but she did hold herself responsible because she had left the pen where youngsters could easily access it. Her feelings got the best of her.
“I gasped as I saw blue splatters across the floor and a thick pool of ink sinking into our carpet – our brand new carpet. I quickly yelled for my husband, who had been doing the dishes, to come and help me. I instantly felt so upset as I grabbed my son and took him to the bathroom to clean him up and my husband started scrubbing those bright blue stains on our carpet.”
Heather’s feelings of annoyance and fury would always resurface whenever she saw the stain on the fresh new carpet. All the wonderful times she had with her sons were symbolized by the stain until the day it was finally removed.
The youngster who spilled blue paint on the carpet was diagnosed with cancer a month later, and he died two years later, leaving the stain as a memento of their time together.
“It was still there . . . and now . . . it was a constant reminder of my son. It was a constant reminder of my frustration over something so trivial . . . something so unimportant in the scheme of life.
That blue stain was a constant reminder that life is messy, but that’s what makes it worth living. A constant reminder to not sweat the small stuff. A constant reminder that ‘things’ aren’t important, but people are. A constant reminder that accidents happen. A constant reminder to let go of the little things and hang on tight to what is important.”
She tried to cover up the vivid blue stain with the furniture, but every time she cleaned the room, there it was, staring at her, reminding her of her loss and the sorrow she was still feeling.
Heather’s story is meant to remind us of how often we take life for granted and fail to appreciate the little things that give our lives meaning. She feels the need to inform all the moms out there that the dirty laundry and strewn about toys are what really make the house a place of comfort and safety for their families.
Those messes, made by the people who matter most to us, are what make our lives worthwhile, as Heather puts it, because there will come a day when we will miss those moments very much indeed. “I would have a million blue ink stains on my carpet if it meant I could have one more day with my son.”
Her advice to moms: don’t let yourself get so wrapped up in the world that you miss out on quality time with your kids. Life is too short to be wasted scrubbing stains, so prioritize what matters most!
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9 Celebrity Fathers Who Raised Their Kids Alone
In the modern world, it’s easy to find moms who raise their kids on their own, while fathers who perform this task alone are a rare thing. Nevertheless, the tendency is there and men are sometimes seen taking full responsibility for the upbringing of their kids.
Bright Side collected the stories of celebrity fathers who, due to different circumstances, were raising their kids alone. Some decided to raise their kids by themselves, others — after a divorce with the spouse, and the last group had to live through some tragic events.
1. Liam Neeson
10 years ago, Liam Neeson’s wife Natasha Richardson fell down and hit her head while skiing at a ski resort and died after several days. Neeson stayed alone with their 2 sons Daniel and Micheal, ages 12 and 13. It took a lot of time for the family to overcome this tragedy but they managed to cope with the loss. Liam Neeson dedicated his life to his kids and never married again.
2. Pierce Brosnan
After marrying actress Cassandra Harris, Pierce Brosnan adopted her 2 kids: Charlotte age 9 and Chris age 8. 3 years later, they gave birth to their own son Sean. Later the Brosnan family experienced a tragedy — Cassandra died from cancer. Since then the actor has been raising their kids alone without any intention to get married again. But in 1994, he met a journalist Keely Shaye Smith whom he married officially in 2001. They have 2 sons — Dylan and Paris.
3. Nicolas Cage
Nicolas Cage’s son, Weston, was born in 1990. The actor wasn’t officially married to the child’s mother and the couple soon broke up. Cage was required to give his ex-girlfriend a house in Hollywood in order to have the right to raise his son alone. Today Weston is 28 years old, he is a musician, and is also starting his career in acting. In 2005 Cage had another son.
4. George Lucas
The creator of the legendary Star Wars saga, George Lucas, has been raising 3 adopted children for many years on his own. Amanda was adopted together with his spouse and she stayed with her father after the divorce. Later he also adopted another daughter, Katie and son, Jett. By the way, they all were filmed in small parts of Star Wars. George Lucas didn’t get married again until 2013. His spouse is the chairwoman of DreamWorks Animation and the president of Ariel Investments, Mellody Hobson. After their marriage, the couple soon gave birth to a daughter.
5. Al Pacino
Al Pacino is the father of 3 kids yet he has never been officially married. His eldest daughter, Julie was born in 1989, and in 2001, actress Beverly D’Angelo gave birth to their twins — Olivia and Anton. The couple broke up after several years, but the parents managed to keep their common child custody which is why their kids spend an equal amount of time with both their father and their mother. The actor has always tried to schedule his working hours so that he could spend more time with his kids.
6. Colin Farrell
Colin Farrell is raising 2 sons: 16-year-old James and 10-year-old Henry. James’s mother is the model Kim Bordenave, but Farrell’s and her relationship didn’t last long. Nevertheless, Colin said that he would provide for his son for life. In 2009, Farrel had his second son Henry. His mother is a Polish actress whom Colin broke up with very quickly.
7. Lenny Kravitz
After his divorce, the musician Lenny Kravitz started to raise their daughter Zoë alone. He had lived with his spouse Lisa Bonet for 3 years. The parents had equal rights to their daughter, but when Zoë turned 11, she moved to live with her father full time. Today Zoë Kravitz is a famous actress and model. This father and daughter often appear at social events together.
Cristiano Ronaldo has many kids. His first son was born by a surrogate mother in 2010. His name is also Cristiano. In 2017, the athlete became a father to 2 twins: daughter Eva and son Mateo. Now he is getting ready for his wedding to Georgina Rodríguez and recently they gave birth to their daughter Alana Martina.
9. Norman Reedus
The star of The Walking Dead TV series, Norman Reedus, has been raising his son Mingus alone for many years. He had been dating supermodel Helena Christensen for about 5 years, but their relationship fell apart. The couple shares joint custody of their son, however, he has lived most of his life with his father in Los Angeles. Today Mingus is 20 years old. Several years ago, Norman Reedus started dating actress Diane Kruger and in 2018, they had a daughter.
Which of these stories impressed you most of all? Please tell us about it in the comments!
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