As many married couples can attest, the journey towards parenthood is one that is often envisaged as being shared equally between both partners. I held a strong conviction that my pregnancy would be a time of shared joy and responsibility with my husband. I imagined us attending each prenatal appointment together, his hand in mine, as we listened to the heartbeat of our unborn child, eagerly discussing our future with excitement and tenderness. Sadly, the reality I faced was starkly different. It became increasingly apparent that my husband was more inclined to prioritize his social life and personal interests, repeatedly sidelining our important prenatal milestones. This recurring pattern of neglect ultimately pushed me to a point where I felt compelled to teach him an unforgettable lesson.
From the moment we discovered I was pregnant, it felt as if we had stepped into a dream. For years, my husband and I had looked forward to starting a family, and now, it seemed our dreams were finally coming to fruition. The news came to us during a short romantic getaway, which felt like the universe’s way of telling us that our lives were about to change for the better. We knew that the journey ahead would be fraught with challenges, but we were ready—or so I thought—to face them together.
In the early weeks, my excitement was palpable. I approached every aspect of pregnancy with a positive spirit, even the less pleasant moments like morning sickness, because I believed that having my husband’s support would make the challenges manageable. However, his lack of involvement soon became evident. It seemed he viewed the pregnancy as my sole responsibility, an ordeal I must face alone while he maintained the freedom of our pre-parenthood days.
During the first trimester, there were nights filled with discomfort and restlessness, where the cold bathroom floor became my refuge. Meanwhile, my husband slept soundly, undisturbed and seemingly oblivious to my struggles. Even a simple gesture of fetching a glass of water seemed too much to ask of him. I found myself growing resentful, feeling abandoned in what was supposed to be our shared journey. I couldn’t help but think, “If I am already doing the job of being pregnant, the least he could do was rub my feet, or help when I am dealing with the worst nausea. I mean the child is not only his when it’s born.”
Our excitement soon soured into tension and frequent arguments. I had hoped that we would at least be able to share the experience of prenatal appointments, but my husband’s attendance was sporadic. He often opted out, preferring to engage in leisure activities with his friends. His excuses were flimsy, and whenever I expressed my disappointment, he dismissed my concerns with a shrug, saying, “I’m not the one carrying the baby, why do I have to go see the doctor with you?”
The turning point came when we were scheduled to attend an appointment to learn the gender of our baby. This was a moment I had envisioned as a milestone for us as a couple, an experience that would further bond us to our child. However, at the last minute, he decided to skip the appointment to enjoy a casual meal of fish ‘n’ chips with a friend. I was devastated and furious, but I managed to keep my composure. Instead of him, my mother accompanied me, and together, we discovered that we were expecting a daughter.
Resolved to make my husband realize the significance of his absence, I planned a poignant reminder for our gender reveal party. I commissioned a cake that was outwardly ordinary, decorated with question marks. However, hidden inside was a unique twist meant to symbolize his recent choices.
At the party, surrounded by friends and family, I asked my husband to do the honors of cutting the cake. As he sliced through the cake, out poured not the traditional blue or pink hues but miniature, edible fish ‘n’ chips. The symbolism was not lost on anyone—this was the meal he had deemed more important than attending the gender reveal of his own child. The room erupted in laughter, and while the atmosphere was light, the message hit home. It was a playful yet serious reminder of what he had missed. Taking advantage of the lighthearted mood, I expressed how crucial it is for us to support each other, especially during such a transformative phase of our lives.
Following the laughter and initial surprise, I presented the real reveal—a second cake, this one intricately decorated in soft pastel colors with delicate baby footprints. Together, we cut into it, revealing a beautiful soft pink interior. The room cheered, “It’s a girl!” The joy and excitement were overwhelming, and it was clear that the message had been received.
The realization of what he had been neglecting seemed to dawn on my husband. His apology that night was heartfelt, and from that day forward, he became a more present and involved partner. He attended every subsequent appointment without fail, and his newfound commitment to our prenatal journey was unmistakable.
As we continued to prepare for the arrival of our daughter, the atmosphere in our home shifted from one of tension to one of eager anticipation. We started planning the nursery, selecting each piece of furniture with care. My husband took particular interest in building some of the furniture himself, showcasing a level of engagement that was both surprising and heartening.
The incident with the fish ‘n’ chips cake became a legendary story within our family, a humorous but poignant reminder of the importance of being present and supportive. It served not only as a lesson for my husband but also as a reminder to both of us about the significance of shared experiences and mutual support in our marriage.
Reflecting on the journey, it became clear that the challenges we faced were not merely obstacles but opportunities for growth. They strengthened our relationship, deepening our understanding and appreciation for one another. As we awaited the arrival of our daughter, we were not just preparing to be parents but also learning to be better partners to each other. This experience, though fraught with initial misunderstandings and adjustments, ultimately enriched our bond and reinforced the foundation upon which our growing family would stand.
5 Creatures That Can Crawl In Through Your Toilet and How to Stop Them
If you are wondering why bugs and other pests pay your bathroom a visit, it’s because of all the moisture. And when we’re talking about the toilet seat, in particular, many people fail to clean it consistently and in detail. Flushing isn’t enough, since there is the residue left behind and that is enough to attract all the wrong guests.
Bright Side wants you to know that many pests can crawl into your house through your toilet and that there are ways to prevent this from happening.
1. Snakes
Snakes just love cool, wet, and dark places and that’s why your toilet pipes can be very intriguing to them. But, what drives them there in the first place is the sewer that has food remnants that they can feed on. When they are finished with their food in the sewer, they will look for a way out and the pipes are the easiest and quickest route. However, you shouldn’t be afraid if you live in a cold environment, since snakes will only sneak up in toilets in warm countries.
It’s usually harmless snakes that crawl through the pipes, like garden or tree snakes. That’s because these snakes are slimmer than venomous ones and can fit through the pipes. Although, some anacondas have appeared in people’s toilets in South America and Australia.
2. Rats
Like snakes, rats are also in constant pursuit of food and our pipes can be very appealing to them. In houses where the toilet and garbage disposal end up in the same pipes, rats are more likely to find a way in. And because their anatomy is very bendy, they can swim through the pipes and hold their breath for minutes before they need air.
So, it’s not just important to discard your food remnants in a trash bag but to also never flush food down the toilet. If there is no food in the pipes, rats won’t have any reason to try and enter your sewage system. You should also keep the toilet cover closed at all times and maybe install a rat guard. This allows water to exit the pipes whenever you flush, but nothing can come up in the opposite direction.
3. Spiders
With spiders, things get a bit more complex, since they can’t swim in your pipes, but they can appear in your bathroom through another passage. And when they get in, they will probably sit outside the toilet seat. Only black widows will crawl inside the toilet and weave their web from side to side. But, that will happen only in an outdoor toilet that doesn’t have plumbing and that isn’t connected to a sewer system.
That’s where these venomous spiders thrive since there are many flies that they can catch for food. That’s also why you need to always check the seat thoroughly before using an outhouse toilet. Spiders, like the black widow, the brown recluse, and the hobo spider won’t have any trouble biting you.
4. Lizards
In the Southwest United States, lizards coming through the toilet pipes are a quite common occurrence. That’s because these creatures love water and they try to find food wherever they can. Crickets and other insects (like flies) can be found a lot in your toilet’s plumbing if it’s not kept decently clean. The lizards that can achieve this are usually small enough that they can fit through the pipes.
5. Possums
In 2008, a man was in his bathroom in Australia when he saw the water in the toilet gurgling. Moments later, a baby possum appeared and this is not the first time this has happened. On another occasion, a woman found a dead possum in her toilet. These unusual guests are excellent swimmers and can hold their breath for a long time — that’s why they can crawl into your toilet.
How to prevent and react to these occurrences
- Keep your toilet clean: This may sound obvious, but you really need to clean your toilet often and neatly. Disinfecting cleaners are perfect for that job and if you want something cheaper you can resort to white wine vinegar or baking soda. You can also get one of those fresheners that stick on the side of the toilet and release a nice smell every time you flush.
- Keep it dry: Most pests love humidity and that’s why they will be attracted to wet bathroom floors. So, it’s important to get rid of any standing water from the sink or the floor after you’ve taken a shower. If you notice any leaks in your plumbing, call a technician immediately and get them fixed.
- Clean your pipes naturally: In a bowl, add equal parts of sugar, water, vinegar, and 5-10 drops of dish soap. Mix all of this together and pour it down the toilet or in your bathroom sink. You can also pour some boiling water into the toilet.
- Call a pest control company: If you don’t have the time or courage to deal with pests yourself, call professionals and let them use their heavy cleaners. After that is done, you can occasionally throw water mixed with a cleaning solution down the drain to make sure no pest will climb up into the toilet.
Have you ever found an uninvited guest in your toilet — if so, what was it and how did you react?
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