The hit 1972 sitcom “M*A*S*H” introduced the world to a number of memorable and beloved characters, from the smart-mouthed yet compassionate Captain Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce to his endearing friend, Captain B.J. Hunnicutt. Almost every character had stuck in the minds of the fans.
One of the characters that often featured but was easily overlooked by his military counterparts due to his nervous nature was the 4077 MASH unit’s company clerk, Corporal Walter Eugene “Radar” O’Reilly. Although many of the staff on the base tended to take Radar’s effort for granted, the fans sure noticed him.
Radar was portrayed by the acclaimed actor Gary Burghoff from the start of the TV show in 1972 until the seventh season, which aired in 1979. Although fans clamored for more of the unassuming clerk, Burghoff revealed that he needed to step away from the show to rekindle his personal relationships and fight burnout.
“M*A*S*H’s” Influence and Burghoff’s Personal Identity
Although Burghoff enjoyed playing Radar, the role became increasingly demanding. The actor commented that it became difficult to separate himself from his character in the eyes of the public, which soon became tedious. He also noted that he despised being fawned over by the crowds:
“Aw, I know I’m cute. Cute, cute, CUTE! I was always cute because I was always the smallest kid on the block. I hate cute.”
Everyone saw Burghoff as an adorable, short, timid character as they’d known him on-screen and on the stage for many years. However, after years of being looked down upon, both metaphorically and physically speaking, Burghoff grew tired of the persona so easily attributed to him by scores of people he had never even met.
The actor lashed out against this view of him as a cute little fellow by defending his height. As he so rightly pointed out, 5 feet 6 inches isn’t irregularly short, and he would have seen the tops of Arte Johnson or Mickey Rooney’s heads had they ever met. Nonetheless, the persona stuck.
Luckily for all his fans, Burghoff didn’t let his disability stand in his way, and he pursued his dream of becoming an actor.
Despite his misgivings about how others perceived him, Burghoff’s fellow cast members adored him. The director Charles Dubin recalled working with Burghoff before he left “M*A*S*H,” noting how caring and pleasant Burghoff was to everyone on set. However, Burghoff had another aspect of himself that drove down his self-esteem.
Burghoff had been born with a congenital disability called Brachydactyly, a form of Poland Syndrome. The condition left the actor with three fingers on his left hand that were noticeably smaller than the rest of his digits, and the abnormality had plagued him since he was a small child. The actor commented:
“Of course, this defect affected me while I was growing up. I suppose when I was very young, I knew my disability would set me apart and make me special.”
Luckily for all his fans, Burghoff didn’t let his disability stand in his way, and he pursued his dream of becoming an actor. Yet, becoming a fan-favorite on one of the most iconic TV shows America had ever produced never managed to quell his insecurities about his stout fingers and stocky frame.
Throughout his run on “M*A*S*H,” Burghoff tried to hide his left hand from the camera. He would often position himself so that the camera could only see one side of his body and usually gestured with his right if the scene required it, although the actor would be obligated to use both hands now and again.
In one of the earliest episodes, viewers were introduced to Radar as he stood in an open area, wearing a greyish shirt and his trademark cap. As the actor turned around and looked at the sky — once again hearing approaching helicopters before everyone else — the camera briefly panned over both his hands holding a football.
When Colonel Sherman T. Potter first made his appearance on the show, taking over from the beloved Lieutenant Colonel Henry Blake, Radar and the new commander shared a scene where they first met. As Colonel Potter exited the room to find the latrines, the camera centered on Burghoff’s upper body as he opened a box with both hands.
Another infamous scene caught Burghoff with both hands on camera. During a regular morning salute, with the loathsome Major Frank Burns leading the ceremony, Radar does his usual morning salute with a bugle. In a hilarious twist, one of the men fires off the ceremonial canon at Burns’s behest.
Naturally, Radar gets the short end of the stick as the cannonball flies directly at him, knocking his instrument clean out of his hands. In the next few seconds, Burghoff turns toward the camera in a pantomime of rage, balling his fists and stomping in outrage. Here, both his hands can be seen for a brief second.
In one of the later episodes, the writers showed off Radar’s softer side when he cuddled his pet guinea pig, Babette. Naturally, Radar stood with his left hand beneath his right, but just as he started to sing, Father John Mulcahy called for him. Burghoff’s hands were visible again as he put the Babette away.
One of the scenes where Burghoff openly showed his left hand came as part of another gag the show pulled. At the start of the scene, Radar could be seen walking across a dirt road while two other military personnel walked away from the camera. The man on Radar’s right first lifted his hand in salute, followed shortly by one on the left.
Radar, the pleasant character he was, lifted his right hand in response to the first salute, as military etiquette dictates. Caught off guard by the quick second salute, Radar lifted his left hand as well, essentially performing a double salute. Feeling sheepish, he frowned and lowered his hands slowly in one of Burghoff’s classic displays of confusion.
A Sales Assistant Told My Wife She Wasn’t ‘Pretty Enough’ to Work in Their Store — I Returned a Few Days Later for the Perfect Revenge
A store assistant dared to bring MY wife to tears by being mean. She did that all because my spouse sought employment at the establishment she worked at. After hearing my wife’s tale, I took action to redress the situation. What I did ensured that the assistant would think twice when addressing anyone else!
An emotional woman crying | Source: Pexels
This is an exciting tale about pure and sweet revenge! My name is Thomas, and Emma, my wife, has ALWAYS had an eye for fashion. Her wardrobe is a testament to her impeccable taste. Not that I am biased or showing off, but my Emma knows all there is to know about the latest trends!
I mean, most days, she’s the one who dresses me. No, not because I am sexist and think it’s her job, but because she LOVES doing that. And to be honest, I look FANTASTIC each time, so I’m NOT complaining!
A woman picking out clothes for a man | Source: Pexels
For years, my wife skirted around her true passion. She did all sorts of jobs. Like being a receptionist, and a nurse at one point (sadly short-lived), and even dabbled in art. But she still couldn’t find her place.
Recently, my beloved wife decided to turn her passion for fashion (see what I did there) into a career. She started actively searching for a job in retail. Her thinking was that it would fit perfectly with her interests.
A woman dressed up and posing in a store | Source: Pexels
When she got home all emotional one day, she told me the story of what happened. Emma explained that on that fateful day, she was at the shopping center in the afternoon. She then noticed a famous lingerie store with a “Now Hiring” poster on the window.
Excited, she revealed, “I immediately went inside to inquire! But boy, was I in for the shock of my life.” She shared how her excitement started dying down when she approached the sales assistant and tried to speak to her.
A store assistant sticking a “Now Hiring” sign | Source: Freepik
The rude woman didn’t even glance my wife’s way until she was DIRECTLY in front of her! A bit down but still quite enthusiastic, Emma asked about the job application process. Instead, the assistant looked her up and down with a sneer and an attitude. Then she delivered the stinging words:
“Look, hun, I don’t think you’re pretty enough for this job. NO CHANCE. Don’t even try, okay?”
A store assistant with an attitude | Source: Pexels
Before calming down enough to be able to tell me her story, my lovely wife was in tears when she came home. She was heartbroken by the cruel remark. I’ve never seen my wife so utterly devastated before, and my heart broke seeing her that way.
I wrapped my arms around her, trying to console her. “My love, don’t let her get to you. You’re beautiful and talented. You’re worth so much more than her words,” I said softly. “But why would she say that?” Emma sobbed. “I just wanted to apply for a job. I didn’t deserve that.”
A man comforting his crying wife | Source: Pexels
“She’s a small-minded person, my angel,” I tried consoling my wife. Seeing her so dejected made me FURIOUS! No one, and I mean NOBODY, should make my Emma feel this way, treat her that badly, and get away with it!
And you know what? As anger took over me, I figured it was high time someone showed that nasty assistant how wrong she was! I decided to give that sales assistant a lesson in humility she would NEVER forget!
A man contemplating something | Source: Pexels
Over the next couple of days, I concocted a plan. I reached out to my friend Mike, who works in the fashion industry, to get his help. Mike was more than willing to assist when he heard what had happened.
“That’s unbelievable, man. Of course, I’ll help. Let’s give her a taste of her own medicine,” Mike said over the phone. A few days later, my plan was set in motion. I dressed well, with the help of my Emma, and headed back to the lingerie store.
A happy man holding a beverage and talking on the phone | Source: Pexels
I had done my research enough to make sure the same sales assistant was working on that day. I then started pretending to browse the aisles, waiting for the perfect moment. When the store had only a few customers, I approached the assistant with a friendly smile.
“Hello, I’m looking to buy something special for my wife. Could you help me pick out a few things?” I asked. Her attitude changed immediately, seeing a potential big sale. She became attentive and started showing me various items.
A man browsing in a lingerie store | Source: Midjourney
“Absolutely, sir! We have a fantastic selection. What’s the occasion?” she asked, her tone now sweet as we went around the store. “Just a surprise for my wife. I want to get her something really special,” I replied, pretending to be thoughtful.
“Great! How about this piece? It’s one of our most popular items,” she suggested, holding up a delicate lace set. “Do you think this would look good on her?” I asked, examining the lingerie. “Oh, definitely! It’s one of our best sellers. Your wife will love it,” she assured me.
A store assistant working | Source: Pexels
“Can you show me a few more options? I want to make sure I get the perfect one,” I said, keeping her engaged. As she showed me more pieces, I made small talk to keep her invested. “So, how long have you been working here?” I inquired.
“About six months,” she replied. “It’s a great job if you have the right look for it.” I nodded, pretending to be interested. “That’s interesting. Do they hire often?”
“Only when they really need someone. They’re picky about who they bring on,” she said with a hint of pride.
A man talking to a store assistant | Source: Midjourney
After about thirty minutes, I told her I needed to step outside to call my wife for her opinion on one of the items. Instead of calling Emma, I called my friend Mike. He arrived quickly to enact his part of the plan.
We walked back into the store together. My pal approached the sales assistant and introduced himself. “Hi there,” Mike began, extending his hand. “I’m Mike Gladstone, a talent scout for a major fashion brand.”
A man reaching out to shake someone’s hand | Source: Freepik
He acted impressed with the store, hinting it was a great place to find fresh talent. “I’ve been looking for someone with a unique look and a great personality. Do you think you might have anyone like that here?”
The assistant’s eyes widened with excitement. “Oh, really? Well, I’ve been told I have a great look for this sort of thing,” she said, clearly thinking this was her big break. Mike gave her a critical once-over and shook his head.
A man contemplating something | Source: Freepik
“I’m sorry, but I don’t think you quite fit what we’re looking for,” he replied. “We need someone who STANDS OUT in the right way, you understand?” The assistant looked UTTERLY crushed!
Before she could respond, Mike turned to me. “What about you?” he asked, gesturing towards me. “You have an interesting look. Have you ever considered modeling?” The assistant’s jaw dropped! She was completely taken aback!
A shocked woman | Source: Freepik
I smiled and replied, “No, but I do have someone in mind who would be perfect for your campaign.” Without missing a beat, I said, “My wife, Emma. She’s stunning, confident, and absolutely beautiful inside and out.”
Mike nodded enthusiastically. “I’d LOVE to meet her. Let’s set up an interview.” I turned to the assistant, who was now pale and visibly shaken. Looking straight into her eyes to get the message across, I said:
“You know, it’s funny how perceptions can be so misleading. Maybe next time, YOU’LL think twice before judging someone based on their looks.”
A man talking to a female store assistant | Source: Midjourney
As we walked out, I could feel the assistant’s eyes burning into my back. Emma met with Mike later. Although she didn’t pursue modeling, the experience gave her a much-needed confidence boost.
“So, how did it go?” I asked my wife when she came back from her meeting with my friend. “It was AMAZING, actually! Mike was so kind and professional!” she beamed. “He said I had real potential,” she said, her face glowing with happiness.
A happy woman lying on a bed | Source: Pexels
“I told you, darling! You have everything it takes,” I replied, hugging her tightly. That evening, Emma and I sat down for dinner, reflecting on the events. “I can’t believe you did all that for me,” she said, holding my hand across the table.
“I’d do anything for you, my love. No one gets to make you feel less than you are,” I said firmly.
A happy couple talking | Source: Pexels
A week later, we were back at the shopping center. This time, Emma walked with newfound confidence. As we passed by the lingerie store, I couldn’t help but glance inside. The sales assistant was there, looking as if she was still recovering from the shock.
“Want to go in and browse?” I teased Emma. She laughed, shaking her head. “I’ve had enough of that store for a lifetime!” We continued walking, hand in hand, knowing that sometimes, the best revenge isn’t just a clever plan. It’s lifting up the ones you love and helping them see their true worth.
A happy couple having beverages at a shopping center | Source: Pexels
So, that’s my story. Sometimes, the best way to handle things is to make someone realize how wrong they were in the most public and humiliating way possible. And trust me, seeing the look on that sales assistant’s face was something I’ll remember forever!
Two men pleased with themselves | Source: Freepik
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