Anne Hathaway reflects on her challenging journey to motherhood and the heartfelt influence her openness about her experience has had over the years.
Oscar-winning actress Anne Hathaway, who is a mother to sons Jonathan, 8, and Jack, 4, with her husband Adam Shulman, recently looked back on her challenging journey to motherhood. She shared how she faced a miscarriage while performing in the Off-Broadway play Grounded for nearly six weeks in 2015.
Reflecting on her experience, she told in a cover story published on March 25, «The first time it didn’t work out for me. I was doing a play and I had to give birth onstage every night.»
During that time, she felt that «it was too much to keep it in when I was onstage pretending everything was fine,» and chose to be honest about her struggles with her friends and family. «I had to keep it real otherwise.»
Later on, she extended this same openness to the public when announcing her pregnancy. She explained, «When it did go well for me, having been on the other side of it — where you have to have the grace to be happy for someone — I wanted to let my sisters know, ’You don’t have to always be graceful. I see you, and I’ve been you.’»
«It’s really hard to want something so much and to wonder if you’re doing something wrong,» she added. The Oscar winner further recalled her shock at learning how many pregnancies end in miscarriage. According to the Mayo Clinic, 10% to 20% of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, though the actual number is likely higher. She wished that this information was more widely disseminated.
Anne continued, «I thought, ’Where is this information? Why are we feeling so unnecessarily isolated?’ That’s where we take on damage. So I decided that I was going to talk about it.»
When Anne Hathaway announced her second pregnancy on Instagram in 2019, she accompanied it with a powerful caption.
«It’s not for a movie…» Hathaway wrote, referring to her baby bump. «All kidding aside, for everyone going through infertility and conception hell, please know it was not a straight line to either of my pregnancies. Sending you extra love.»
Reflecting on the impact of her candid post, she shared, «The thing that broke my heart, blew my mind, and gave me hope was that for three years after, almost daily, a woman came up to me in tears and I would just hold her, because she was carrying this (pain) around, and suddenly it wasn’t all hers anymore.»
Reflecting on her experience, she shared that given «the pain I felt while trying to get pregnant, it would’ve felt disingenuous to post something all the way happy when I know the story is much more nuanced than that for everyone.»
Recently another actress, Nicole Kidman, also shared her struggles having children.
Preview photo credit Siegfried Nacion/STAR MAX/IPx/Associated Press/East News, annehathaway / Instagram
MY HUSBAND SPENT OUR FAMILY’S SAVINGS FOR A CAR ON A PARIS TRIP FOR HIS MOM — SO I TAUGHT HIM A LESSON ABOUT FINANCES.
The weight of the betrayal settled in my stomach like a cold stone. Three years. Three years of sacrifice, of pinching pennies and foregoing simple pleasures, all for a car that would keep our family safe. And he’d squandered it. On a whim. On a trip to Paris for his mother.
David, bless his oblivious heart, seemed genuinely surprised by my reaction. He’d always been a mama’s boy, and I’d tolerated it, even indulged it, to a point. But this? This was beyond the pale.
“It’s my money too!” he’d protested, his voice rising in that familiar defensive tone. “She deserves it! You can’t put a price on gratitude.”
I’d simply stared at him, my mind reeling. Gratitude? What about gratitude for the sacrifices I’d made, for the countless hours I’d spent juggling work, kids, and household chores? What about gratitude for the safety of our children?
I knew arguing would be futile. He was locked in his own world of justifications, and I wasn’t about to waste my breath. Instead, I retreated, a quiet fury simmering beneath my composed exterior.
Over the next few days, I played the part of the understanding wife. I smiled, nodded, and even helped him pack his mother’s suitcase. I listened patiently as he recounted his mother’s excited phone calls, her plans for sightseeing and shopping.
But beneath the surface, I was plotting. I was determined to teach him a lesson about finances, about responsibility, about the true meaning of family.
First, I contacted his mother. I explained the situation, the crumbling van, the precarious state of our family finances. She was mortified. She’d always been a sensible woman, and she was appalled by her son’s impulsive decision. She offered to pay for the trip herself, but I declined. Instead, I suggested a compromise. She could still go to Paris, but for a shorter period, a weekend getaway rather than a full week. The difference in cost would be returned to our car fund.
Next, I tackled the issue of David’s “my money too” argument. I opened a joint account, separate from our everyday expenses, and deposited the remaining car fund, along with the money his mother had returned. I then created a detailed budget, outlining our household expenses, including the cost of a new (used) car. I presented it to David, highlighting the glaring discrepancy between our needs and his impulsive spending.
I also introduced him to the concept of “family meetings.” Every Sunday, we would sit down together, discuss our finances, and make joint decisions about spending. The kids were included, too, learning about the value of money and the importance of saving.
Finally, I decided to address the issue of his mother’s constant demands. I didn’t want to create a rift between them, but I needed to establish boundaries. I suggested that we set aside a small portion of our budget for gifts and experiences for both our families, to be agreed upon by both of us.
The changes weren’t immediate. David grumbled about the budget, about the “unnecessary” family meetings. But slowly, he began to understand. He started to appreciate the sacrifices I’d made, the careful planning that kept our family afloat. He even started to enjoy the family meetings, seeing them as an opportunity to connect with the kids and make joint decisions.
The day we drove our newly purchased (used) car home, David looked at me, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and gratitude. “Thank you,” he said, his voice sincere. “For teaching me.”
I smiled. “We’re a team, David,” I said. “And teams work together.”
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