During a guest appearance on HBO’s Who’s Talking to Chris Wallace, the 80-year-old Copacabana singer said he didn’t think it was important to announce his sexuality during the earlier decades of his career.
Manilow came out in 2017, almost three years after he married his husband and manager Garry Kief in a private ceremony. The couple have been together for 45 years now, though they’ve kept much of their relationship away from the public eye.
When he came out to People magazine in 2017, Manilow — whose real name is Barry Pincus — worried he’d be “disappointing” some of his fans by revealing his sexuality. Instead, Manilow, who was 73 at the time, said the reaction from his fanbase was “beautiful.”
Despite his current feelings of nonchalance about his own coming out, Manilow said announcing his sexuality as his career was booming would have been a bad idea.
“Now being gay is no big deal,” he explained. “Back in the ’70s it would have killed a career.”
Regardless, the usually very private Manilow said he thinks “everybody knew that Garry and I were a couple all those years.”
“Really, Garry and I’ve been together for so long,” he said. “It just never dawned on me that we’re going to come out. But when we got married, it was a big deal, so we did.”
Manilow credited Kief for saving his life. He said he is thankful he had Kief to support him as his music career was taking off, despite keeping their relationship under wraps.
“As my career exploded, it was just crazy. And, you know, going back to an empty hotel room, you can get into a lot of trouble if you’re alone night after night after night,” Manilow explained. “But I met Garry right around when it was exploding. And I didn’t have to go back to those empty hotel rooms. I had somebody to cry with or to celebrate with.”
Manilow said he did not wish an isolated hotel room for any young people.
“It was pretty lonely until I met Garry. And then it was fun,” he smiled.
Kief is not Manilow’s first spouse. In 1964, Manilow married his high school sweetheart, Susan Deixler. They were married for one year.
Manilow told CNN’s Wallace he “really did love” Deixler, but added “the gay thing was pretty, pretty strong. I couldn’t deny it.”
The singer said he knew he was gay before marrying Deixler, but their marriage ended because Manilow couldn’t be the committed husband his then-wife needed. He revealed that his sexuality was not the reason his marriage failed.
“We had a very nice marriage, it was great, but I was away every night making music, as a young musician would be,” Manilow described. “It wasn’t good for me, and it wasn’t good for her.”
“I couldn’t be the proper husband,” he continued. “I was out making music every night, sowing my wild oats. I wasn’t ready to settle down.”
Brooklyn-born Manilow skyrocketed to international fame in 1974 after his release of the ever-popular pop-rock ballad Mandy. He became one of the biggest-selling musicians of all time. Prior to his success as a singer-songwriter, Manilow was behind a number of famous commercial jingles for brands like State Farm and Band-Aid — a gig that he has said helped him create catchy hooks for his own hit songs.
I Got into a Car Accident — Then I Overheard My Future MIL Urging My Fiancé to Dump Me
I always believed life had a strange way of testing us, pushing our limits, and revealing who truly stands by our side when the storm hits. I just never thought that test would come through my future mother-in-law.
That belief was put to the ultimate test several months ago when a tragic car accident left me with injuries so severe that the doctors were pessimistic about my full recovery.
A young woman in a wheelchair drinking coffee while staring out the window in thought. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
They cautioned that even with extensive rehabilitation, I’d likely have a permanent limp, and for a time, I needed a wheelchair. Throughout this ordeal, my fiancé, Ethan, was an unwavering pillar of support. We even said to each other, “Nothing’s stopping our wedding, not even this.”
As our wedding approached, I found solace in the pages of my favorite books, seeking refuge from the harsh realities of physical therapy and doctor’s appointments. One evening, while I was lost in a novel, Ethan was in the lounge with his mother.
A young woman in a wheelchair reading. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
I was thankful when his mother offered her help the previous night, which I thought she had come over to do. But oh, was I ever so wrong!
Their voices, usually clear and distinct, were now hushed to whispering tones. Curiosity piqued, I listened, unprepared for the chilling words that flowed from my future mother-in-law’s lips.
A woman talking to her son and daughter. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
“Son, you have to leave her otherwise…” She stopped mid-sentence before changing course, “Honey, you are so young and so handsome. Just imagine what a burden she will be for you!”
Frozen, my heart hammering in my chest as I waited for Ethan to defend our love, to speak up about how this wheelchair was only temporary. But silence followed. His silence was a gaping void that swallowed my hope whole.
A sad woman. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
Distraught, I wheeled myself to our bedroom, tears blurring my vision. I was hurt and confused, a storm that couldn’t find its calm. When Ethan entered, his face crumpled in worry at the sight of me crying.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice laced with genuine concern.
“You can leave me,” I managed between sobs. “I’d understand that.”
A woman crying into a pillow. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
Ethan’s confusion was palpable. “What? Why on earth should I leave you? You are the love of my life!”
“But why didn’t you say that to your mom? I heard everything!”
He rushed to my side, taking my hands in his. “Oh dear. I’m so sorry you heard that. But my reaction wasn’t at all what you thought. After hearing her words, a perfect plan came to my mind to teach my mom a lesson. I stayed silent because I needed her to think I might actually consider it. This was all part of my plan to show her how wrong she is about us, and about you.”
A man comforts his fiancée. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
Skeptical yet intrigued, I listened as Ethan unveiled his plan. “Let’s pretend we’re breaking up because of the injury. We’ll even stage a dramatic scene at our upcoming engagement party where I ‘decide’ I can’t handle the pressure. But here’s the twist—right after we pretend to break up, we’ll reveal the truth to everyone about how unsupportive and cruel my mom has been, exposing her in front of our friends and family.”
It was bold, risky, and fueled by the sting of betrayal. I was hurt enough to agree.
Couple hatching a plan. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
The engagement party was a scene straight out of a drama. Under the twinkling lights and the watchful eyes of our friends and family, Ethan and I enacted our plan.
His performance was convincing, his feigned frustration bubbling over as he declared he couldn’t do this anymore. The room fell into a stunned silence, the air thick with shock and disbelief.
Then, the moment of truth arrived.
A visibly shocked reaction from one of the guests at the party. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
Standing (with some difficulty) I addressed the gathered crowd. “This was a test,” I began, my voice steady despite the pounding of my heart. “A test to show the true colors of someone who claimed to love me unconditionally.”
Ethan joined in, explaining our ruse and calling out his mother’s earlier words and lack of support. The impact was immediate.
My mother-in-law, caught in her own cruel game, was mortified. She stuttered apologies, her façade of politeness crumbling before everyone. The crowd’s reaction was mixed; some were shocked, others whispered among themselves, but the message was clear: no one would look at her the same way again.
A mortified woman staring out a window. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
From that day on, she was much more cautious around us, her words measured, her actions careful. Ethan and I grew stronger, our bond fortified by the ordeal. We learned the hard truth about the challenges we faced, not just from life’s unpredictable twists but from those we least expected.
As I continued to heal, both physically and emotionally, I realized that this test, harsh as it was, taught us about the depth of our resilience and the unyielding strength of love.
A happy couple on the beach. For illustration purposes only | Source: Pexels
In the end, life’s trials did indeed reveal who stood by me — not just the man I loved, but the strength I harbored within myself. Wheels and all, I was ready to face whatever came our way, with Ethan truly by my side.
Those you love and choose to build a family with don’t always stand by you when it matters, and even that can be a lesson, as another woman found out when her future MIL turned her life upside down and used food to do it.
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
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