I’m a full-time mom. About a year ago, I left my job to take care of our three-year-old daughter, who is autistic and requires a lot of support. Lately, I’ve noticed that my usually feminist husband has been criticizing me in a group chat.
Transitioning into the role of a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) wasn’t something I had envisioned for myself. I used to thrive in the fast-paced world of marketing, surrounded by campaigns and fueled by brainstorming sessions over coffee. But all that changed a little over a year ago when my husband, Jake, and I made a significant decision. Our daughter, Lily, who is three and autistic, needed more attention than what her daycare could provide. Her needs are complex, requiring constant care and support, and it became clear that one of us had to be with her full-time.
I won’t sugarcoat it — leaving my career behind was one of the toughest decisions I’ve ever made. I miss the freedom of earning my own income and the satisfaction of a job well done. But here I am now, spending my days planning meals, cooking, and baking. I’ve found joy in these tasks, and experimenting in the kitchen has become my new creative outlet.
Our backyard has turned into a small garden oasis under my care, and I take care of most of the household chores. Jake does his fair share too; he’s actively involved in chores and parenting whenever he’s at home. We’ve always considered ourselves equals, rejecting traditional gender roles, or so I thought until last week.
It was a regular Thursday, and I was tidying up Jake’s home office while he was at work. It’s filled with tech gadgets and piles of paperwork, typical for someone in software development. His computer screen caught my eye — it was still on, casting a soft glow in the dim room. He usually left it on by accident, but what I saw next wasn’t accidental at all.
His Twitter feed was open, and I froze when I saw the hashtag #tradwife attached to a tweet. Confusion washed over me as I read the post. It glorified the joys of having a traditional wife who embraces her domestic duties. Attached was a photo of me, taking a batch of cookies out of the oven, looking every bit like a 1950s housewife. My stomach churned as I scrolled through more posts. There I was again, tending to the garden and reading to Lily, our faces thankfully obscured.
This was Jake’s account, and he had been crafting a whole narrative about our life that was far from reality. He portrayed me as a woman who relished her role as a homemaker, willingly sacrificing her career for aprons and storybooks. The truth of our situation — that this arrangement was a necessity for our daughter’s well-being — was nowhere to be seen.
I felt betrayed. Here was the man I’d loved and trusted for over a decade, sharing our life with strangers under a false pretense that felt foreign to me. It wasn’t just the lies about our relationship dynamics that hurt — it was also the realization that he was using these glimpses of our life to bolster some online persona.
I shut the computer down, my hands trembling with a mix of anger and bewilderment. All day, I grappled with my emotions, trying to comprehend why Jake would do this. Was he dissatisfied with our situation? Did he resent my decision to stay home? Or was it something deeper, a shift in how he perceived me now that I wasn’t contributing financially?
The rest of the day passed in a blur. His posts kept replaying in my mind, and eventually, I couldn’t ignore them any longer. I decided to call him and address everything head-on.
“Jake, we need to talk,” I finally said, trying to keep my voice steady.
He answered, sounding concerned. “What’s wrong?”
I took a deep breath, the weight of my discovery weighing heavily on me. “I saw your Twitter today…”
His expression fell, and he let out a long sigh, indicating he knew exactly what this conversation was about to entail. He started to respond, but I interrupted him.
“Calm down,” he said, dismissing it as “just harmless posting.” That was the final straw. I told him I wanted a divorce, called him out for his deceit, and ended the call.
Jake rushed home immediately. We argued, but with Lily’s strict schedule, I couldn’t let the conflict drag on. He pleaded with me to have a proper conversation after putting Lily to bed. Reluctantly, I agreed. That night, he showed me his phone, revealing that he had deleted the Twitter account. But the damage was already done.
A week passed, and my anger hadn’t subsided. This wasn’t a simple misunderstanding. It was a breach of trust. Jake attempted to explain, claiming it started as a joke, but he got carried away with the attention it garnered. But excuses weren’t enough.
Motivated by a mix of hurt and the need for justice, I decided to expose him. I took screenshots of his tweets and shared them on my Facebook page. I wanted our friends and family to know the truth. My post was straightforward: “Your husband belittles you in front of his friends behind your back. Sound familiar?”
The response was immediate. Our relatives were shocked, and the comments poured in. Jake was inundated with messages and calls. He left work early once more to beg for my forgiveness. He knelt, tears in his eyes, pleading that it was all just a “silly game.”
But I couldn’t let it go. The trust that bound us together was broken. It wasn’t just about a few misguided posts; it was about the respect and understanding we were supposed to have for each other. I told him I needed time and space to think and heal. I moved out with Lily to another apartment.
For six months, Jake begged for forgiveness. He sent messages, left voicemails, and made small gestures to show he was sorry. But sorry wasn’t enough. I told him that if he truly wanted to make amends, we needed to start anew. In my eyes, we were strangers now, and he had to court me like he did years ago when we first met.
So, we began again, slowly. We went on dates, starting with coffee and progressing to dinners. We talked a lot — about everything except the past. It was like rediscovering ourselves individually and as a couple. Jake was patient, perhaps realizing this was his last chance to salvage our once-loving relationship.
As I sit here now, reflecting on the past year, I realize how much I’ve changed. This betrayal forced me to reevaluate not only my marriage but also myself and my needs. I’ve learned that forgiveness isn’t just about accepting an apology; it’s about feeling secure and valued again. It’s a gradual process, one that we’re both committed to, step by step.
What would you have done if you were in my shoes? Share your thoughts on Facebook.
Pittie Mom Can’t Stop Crying For Her Puppies After Being Abandoned At Shelter
When Cinnamon – a red nose Pitbull girl – was dumped at the Charlotte Mecklenburg Animal Care & Control shelter in North Carolina, she was absolutely heartbroken.
She had been abandoned without her babies, and every time anyone stopped to talk to her, tears filled her eyes.
This sad Pitbull mama caught the eyes of one volunteer, who then decided to film a short video of her and post it on Facebook.
Only 48 hours later, the life of Cinnamon completely changed.
Cry Of A Broken Heart
Subscribe to the Dog Lovers Club!
Sarah Jennings Sleime, normally a volunteer for the Greater Charlotte SPCA, decided one Saturday that she was going to make a spontaneous trip to animal control to check out a couple of dogs for rescue.
She had no idea that one dog in particular was going to break her heart.
“I walked the kennels and a pit bull caught my eye… she was sitting up, kind of slumped-over, almost human-like,” Sleime wrote in her Instagram post.
It was pretty obvious that she recently had puppies and was completely heartbroken since her puppies weren’t there with her.
“[The shelter workers] believe she was confined and used as a breeding machine. She’s obviously had many, many litters,” Sleime told The Dodo.
She then bent over and started to talk to Cinnamon, but each time she did so, Cinnamon’s eyes filled with tears.
“It was the craziest phenomenon,” Sleime said.
In the absence of a foster home, the SPCA was unable to rescue any big dogs, but Sleime knew she had to do something to help this poor dog.
“I snapped some video footage of her “crying” and posted it to Facebook. 48 hours later, that video has been viewed 1 MILLION times and shared by 20k people,” Sleime wrote.
In only a day, Sleime’s inbox was filled with hundreds of messages about Cinnamon and her availability.
So many people wanted to adopt this pretty girl and give her a new life that will not be filled with tears.
Happily Ever After
Sleime’s friend, Meghan Connor Shelton, from Charlotte, North Carolina, was also among the hundreds of people to see Cinnamon’s video.
She told The Dodo:
“I have a special place in my heart for pit bulls. I think they’re a very misunderstood dog and a misunderstood breed. And when I saw her in that video, literally crying in a cage, I cried. My kids cried. I showed my husband, and he said we could go look at her tomorrow.”
The next morning, Shelton’s family was first in line to meet Cinnamon.
The whole family, including the children, were immediately in love with her. “It was love at first sight. She just kind of pulled at our heartstrings,” Shelton said.
They filled out the paperwork, and as soon as Cinnamon – now known as Rosie – was spayed, they brought her home.
The family already had another dog at home – a 3-year-old Pitbull male named Blu.
At first, they weren’t sure if the two would get along, especially since Rosie had suffered a lot in her life, but she surprised everyone.
“It was interesting because you never know how it’s going to go, but they just kind of sat next to each other with tails wagging,” Shelton said.
The two are now the best of friends, and they enjoy each other’s company. It’s like they’ve known each other their whole life.
As Rosie slowly got used to her new home and life, her personality also blossomed. According to the family, one of her most interesting characteristics is that “when she gets excited, she snorts like a pig”.
Rosie’s touching video not only secured her a new home, but it also helped many other dogs at the shelter find their forever home.
“Small acts have a big impact: Not only was this sweet dog, Cinnamon, adopted the next morning, but other families who came to adopt her saved other dogs at the shelter, freeing up kennels for strays and owner surrenders waiting in the back who would have certainly been euthanized as the shelter is full,” Sleime said.
One simple video or a photo can reach millions of people and in a matter of seconds, change someone’s life.
Visit the CMPD Animal Care and Control page, and the Greater Charlotte SPCA’s website for more information about adoptable dogs for an opportunity to save another pup’s life just like Rosie’s was saved.
Leave a Reply