I Told My Friend She Married a Useless Man, and Now She Hates Me

I take it that everyone of us must navigate our own lives and take responsibility for our decisions? However, it is in our nature as humans to want to help friends who are actually in need. However, what would you do if your friend—the one you always stand by—started confiding in you about all of their issues, repeatedly, and with no sign of stopping? This Reddit member is exactly in that predicament. She wondered if she was managing the matter with her buddy correctly, so she looked to the large internet community for advice.

I(32F) am a single mother of two kids (6M and 5m F). I am a single mother by choice (my kids are donor conceived).

I am lucky enough to have a good job (French teacher in a private school), and a paid off house (parents’ life insurance and inheritance).

Before I had either of my kids, I made sure to have a year’s living expenses saved, then I would take a sabbatical to recover from birth, as well as bond with my kids. While on sabbatical, I still tutor some kids for some extra income.

My friend (34F), just had a baby 2 months ago. She is the breadwinner in her household, and her husband has been unemployed since he was laid off during COVID.

It was great to be pregnant at the same time, as well as having a friend with a newborn. But it has turned sour.

She has been saying how jealous she is of me being able to take off a whole year from work, how she would have loved to not worry about losing their home, how she doesn’t even have a couple hundred dollars in her savings account, let alone a whole year’s worth of living expenses….

I usually ignore it, or brush it off, because I kind of can understand the stress she is under.

Well, starting about 10 days ago, she started hinting at not being able to afford daycare, and any mention of her husband taking care of their kid is brushed off. Then she started remarking on how much free time I must have, which I deflected by saying -truthfully- that being a single mom to a baby and a small kid left me no free time actually.

Then last night she came out with it, and asked if I could “do her a favor” and watch her kid while she’s at work. I was firm, but polite, when I said that I couldn’t, that I am not capable of watching two kids under 6 months.

She started almost begging me, saying she can’t afford daycare, and if she is not back at work, she will lose her job, and they will end up homeless. I again brought up her husband, and she said that he was not good with kids, and isn’t capable of taking care of her kid.

I kept saying no, she kept pushing, until it escalated to her calling me heartless, and me telling her that it’s not my problem she chose to have a kid with a useless man.

Now she blocked me, I am feeling very guilty about what I said, and feeling like an AH.

Hollywood Legend Dustin Hoffman’s Private Fight Against Cancer Revealed

Dustin Hoffman, who famously dressed in drag for *Tootsie* 30 years ago, used his acting skills to keep a serious secret: a battle with cancer that almost took his life.

In 2013, the *Rain Man* actor, then 75, revealed that he had quietly undergone treatment for throat cancer, which was “surgically cured.” After that, he never spoke about it publicly again. Here’s more about the Oscar-winning actor’s journey with cancer.

In 1967, at 30 years old, Dustin Hoffman had his breakthrough role in the romantic comedy *The Graduate*, which earned him his first Oscar nomination.

Over the years, Hoffman starred in iconic films like *All the President’s Men* (1976) and *Kramer vs. Kramer* (1979), which won him an Academy Award for Best Actor.

In 1983, Hoffman played a washed-up actor who dresses as a woman to get a role on a soap opera in the movie *Tootsie*, showcasing his incredible versatility.

\In the hit film *Tootsie*, Dustin Hoffman’s character was called a “nottie” instead of a “hottie,” which brought him to tears, he shared.

“If I were going to be a woman, I’d want to be as beautiful as possible. But they told me, ‘That’s as good as it gets,’” Hoffman recalled in an interview.

When he realized he wasn’t considered attractive as a woman, the now 86-year-old actor had a life-changing realization about how society views women.

“I went home and started crying,” Hoffman says. “I thought, ‘I’m an interesting woman,’ but I knew if I met that version of myself at a party, I wouldn’t talk to her because she didn’t meet the physical standards we’re taught women need to have for us to approach them.”

Even though *Tootsie* was the second-highest-grossing film of the year—just behind *E.T. The Extraterrestrial*—Dustin Hoffman didn’t find it funny.

“That was never a comedy for me,” he added.

Despite his feelings about the film, Hoffman became one of the most sought-after actors in Hollywood.

He earned his second Oscar for the 1988 film *Rain Man* and went on to win six Golden Globes and one Primetime Emmy.

In 2013, Hoffman, who had always been very active in his career, suddenly went quiet.

It was later revealed that his cancer had been detected early.

Just months after Dustin Hoffman made his directorial debut with the British comedy *Quartet* (2012) and finished filming *Chef* (2014) alongside Jon Favreau and Sofia Vergara, the reason for his absence became clear.

Hoffman’s publicist, Jodi Gottlieb, shared with *People* (through ABC News) that the beloved actor had been privately treated for cancer. She didn’t reveal many details but said, “It was detected early, and he has been surgically cured. Dustin is feeling great and is in good health.”

At 75, Hoffman underwent preventative treatments to reduce the chances of the cancer returning. While Gottlieb didn’t specify the type of cancer, it was widely believed to be throat cancer.

Even after the news, Hoffman’s career didn’t slow down. He lent his voice to Master Shifu in more *Kung Fu Panda* films (2008 to 2024) and acted in several other movies, including *Sam and Kate* in 2022 and the upcoming sci-fi drama *Megalopolis* in 2024. Hoffman, now 86, continues to remind us of his resilience and passion for acting.

In early March 2024, *Hello!* magazine reported that Dustin Hoffman and his wife, Lisa Gottsegen, were seen walking around London, showing some sweet moments of affection.

Hoffman, who married Gottsegen in 1980, added four children to his family, along with two children from his previous marriage to Anne Byrne.

The article noted, “The Hollywood legend looked much younger than his 86 years as he smiled and waved at the cameras. He appeared tanned and relaxed while strolling through the city and visiting shops with his wife of 43 years.”

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