Hi there, this is Patty. I can declare with confidence that I have had a great and happy life after 90 wonderful years. Since my husband passed away a few years ago, Angie, my daughter, and I have mostly been spending our time together.
I was ecstatic as my ninetieth birthday approached. My daughter had assured me that she would come see me and spend the day with my grandchildren.
Imagining my grandchildren brings me constant joy. It reminds me of the times when my spouse and I raised Angie. My grandchildren remind me of those special occasions because they look so much like her.
They also have a father who looks like Angie’s ex-husband, John. I loved John so much that I was devastated by their split. The closest thing I’ve ever had to a son was John. He had a big heart and was friendly. He still sends me a Christmas card every year, even now. While I had hoped for John and Angie to be back together, life has other ideas.
When my birthday finally arrived, I was overjoyed. But as the day went on, my enthusiasm gave way to anxiety. It was getting close to lunchtime, and Angie had not responded to me. I called her multiple times, but she didn’t pick up.
When I tried to call Angie again, the call went straight to voicemail. Since she was driving, I thought she wouldn’t be able to respond. But as time went on, it became evident that, like many other days, I would be spending this birthday alone.
I was about to give up when someone rang the doorbell. If my knees weren’t so weak, I would have immediately jumped up in excitement. I was quite happy with my birthday present from Angie and the kids, since it had been a long time.
My heart fell when I saw a manly figure through the glass of the entrance. When I answered the door, I saw a happy John with gifts and flowers in his hands.
“Happy Birthday, Mom!” He gave a kind greeting.
“John? Oh, you didn’t have to,” I said, startled and happy at the same time.
“A small token to honor your amazing day,” John stated as he passed the presents.
Is that the chocolate of my dreams? You remembered, huh? My cheeks flushed with joy as I exclaimed.
How could I overlook that? It’s all you ever eat,” John laughed in response.
You’re overly charming. Could you come to supper with me? Asking him to come in, I did.
Oh no. Not that I would want to bother. You must have plans. John answered modestly, “I just wanted to drop off your presents and see your gorgeous self.
“That’s absurd! I would like the company, and I don’t have anything planned. I insisted, “Plus, I’m making apple pie.”
“Pineapple pie? John chuckled as he entered, “You ought to have led with that.”
John, like my late spouse, is an amazing chef. John did the majority of the cooking while we were together during the day. I was just happy to have the company. It was during supper that John finally inquired about Angie.
Will Angie and the children be joining us then? I would really like not think that I was ambushing her or doing anything similar. Although I really didn’t plan to remain, I’m pleased I did, John remarked.
“That’s absurd! We are family since you are my grandchildren’s father. And unfortunately, I don’t think Angie will come with us today,” I sadly said.
“Oh, that’s disappointing to hear. John said, “You shouldn’t spend your birthday by yourself.
“I’m not alone now, son, thanks to you,” I murmured, taking hold of his hand. “John, thank you.”
“No issue. Would you mind telling me why she didn’t come? or the children, at any rate? They enjoy having time with you, John continued.
“They were meant to arrive, but Angie won’t take my calls. I genuinely don’t know what transpired, but I have no doubt she will contact me again,” I remarked.
“I don’t know what’s going on with her, but she ought to at least drop the kids off. I’m going to call her,” John urged.
To my astonishment, Angie answered the phone when John called her. John later explained to me the reason behind my daughter’s birthday stand-up.
As it happens, the kids, Angie, and her new boyfriend are all on vacation. She kept it from everyone! John told me, clearly distressed.
“Trip? Did she not inform anyone, too? Why would she act in such way? I enquired.
“Patty, your guess is as good as mine. How can she get away with taking my kids and without saying anything? John replied, looking just as confused.
Oh no. This is really disheartening. Furthermore, who is this man? I was even more perplexed as I answered, “I had no idea Angie had a boyfriend.
She had made a casual reference, but an entire vacation? It seems that they had been organizing it for approximately a month. I apologize, Patty, but I think your daughter went too far this time, John stated in a frustrated tone.
I unhappily answered, “Yes, this is disappointing.”
I was shocked to hear the news. Angie could have at least informed me that she wouldn’t be available. I spoke with Angie later. The damage was done, but she said she would see the kids as soon as possible. I was truly saddened, but I will always adore my daughter.
John’s presence thankfully lessened the blow. But Angie’s actions caused a serious wound. I don’t know how to trust her at this point. How should I respond in this circumstance?
Our Granddaughter Called Us Stingy Because of Her Wedding Gift from Us
This time, we sent an air fryer to our youngest granddaughter, the cheapest thing on her registry. Eloise called us, livid, accusing us of being cheap. I remember picking up her call and she didn’t even say hi, she just started ranting, “Seriously, Grandma? I just got your gift. An air fryer? That’s the cheapest thing you could find on my registry!”
I was taken aback because as much as the air fryer was the cheapest on their registry, I still thought it’d be useful to them, so I told her that. Eloise kept on complaining, “Useful? Come on, you know you can do better than that. Everyone knows you have the money. I just can’t believe you’d be this cheap with me. It’s embarrassing.”
In this heated moment, I told her, “Yes, you’re right. We are cheap, old, and useless. The only thing you DIDN’T know is that the day before the wedding, we were going to gift you a check for $40,000.”
I revealed this in an attempt to explain to Eloise about the cash gift we usually give our grandkids before the wedding but she was so angry at this point, that she wasn’t listening to a thing I said. I speculated that maybe she didn’t believe we would gift her such an amount of money after only buying her an air fryer.
Eventually, she said, “No, it’s clear. You just don’t love me enough to show it. You know how much pressure I’m under with the wedding. And then, this? It’s like you don’t even care,” then she hung up.
Despite my husband and I’s shock at Eloise’s reaction, we then bought her a China set, hoping to appease her, but decided against giving her the $40,000, feeling she hadn’t earned it.
Fast forward to last week. Eloise talked to her brother and found out that we were telling her the truth about the money. After confirming it with her cousins, she, called again, accusing us of discrimination, “I just found out that it’s true you gave the money to everyone else when they got married. Why didn’t I get anything?”
We stood firm, explaining our stance was due to her initial reaction, “We felt after your reaction to the wedding gift, it wasn’t right to go ahead and gift you the money.” Eloise pleaded trying to convince us otherwise, “So, you’re punishing me? Is that it? Because I was upset about an air fryer?”
I was angry that she didn’t even understand what she did wrong. “It wasn’t about the air fryer, Eloise. It was how you spoke to us, the disrespect. That’s not something we expected or can support,” I explained.
Eloise implored us, nearly in tears, “But that’s so unfair! I was stressed, Grandma. Planning a wedding is hard, and I just snapped. I didn’t mean any of it.” I felt like she should have only apologized to us instead of finding excuses to justify her behavior.
However, I told her, “We understand that it’s a stressful time, but actions and words have consequences. We hoped you’d understand the value of family and love over material things.” Full of desperation, Eloise added, “But you don’t understand! Can’t we just forget all this happened? I need that money, Grandma.”
She pleaded, threatened to boycott Christmas, and accused us of cutting her off but we didn’t budge. In the end, I expressed, “We love you very much. This has nothing to do with cutting you off. We just hope you’ll reflect on this and understand why we made our decision.”
Now, Eloise has followed up on her threat and she’s boycotting Christmas. Her mother, who is our daughter-in-law, is siding with her, calling us unreasonable. However, we feel that after all we have done for Eloise, the air fryer gift, shouldn’t have triggered this reaction.
For context, we had already paid for her college, and her parents covered her graduate school and half the wedding. Additionally, she and her husband are financially comfortable and do not desperately need our money.
We’re also not upset with our grandkids for revealing the cash gift since she is among the group of family members who are allowed to know about it. Our reason for sending the air fryer earlier was that we live far away, so we always send our gifts early.
The wedding gift is also separate from the money, which we give with the hope it will be used for something significant, like a home. Now, we feel like the action we took towards Eloise was well deserved and we are not going back on our decisions even if she and her mom threaten to do their worst.
Despite the tumultuous events and Eloise’s refusal to understand our perspective, my husband and I stand by our decision. Love and respect in our family are paramount, and we hoped this situation would be a learning experience for her.
The holidays might be quieter this year with her family’s absence, but our hope is for healing and understanding in the future. Our door and hearts remain open to Eloise, whenever she’s ready to mend fences.
Want more like this? Click here to read about a grandmother who sparked controversy online because she doesn’t bring her grandchildren gifts when she visits.
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