Now don’t get me wrong, she wasn’t annoying me because I was a mean mother-in-law (MIL) who hated her. But because of her selfish question. It seemed I was expected to always be around. “I am going on a vacation to the Bahamas. I already bought the tickets and booked myself at a lovely hotel.”
My son and DIL exchanged surprised looks before staring at me as if I’d grown a second head. “This is so unlike you, mom. Who are you going with?” I rolled my eyes at George’s response. He’d somehow forgotten that before he had kids, I was jetsetting every few months!
“That’s not true my love. I used to travel all the time when my time was mine,” I replied a bit irritated. I couldn’t believe how clueless he’d become when it came to my life. “Well, where are we going to get someone to babysit the kids for free every day?”
I realized at that moment that I’d spoiled these two. “Your parents are a start, Sarah. Arrange play dates with your friends’ children or something, I don’t know,” I said in frustration. Why was I the one who had to figure out what THEY did with their own children?
It dawned on me how much I had made them dependent on me. It wasn’t my intention, I think I took the Gam-Gam role a bit too far, and I so loved my little munchkins! They gave me so much to live for. But I was tired and needed a break.
Without waiting for their response, which I anticipated would make me angry, I turned to leave. “I will send you the details of when I leave, where I’ll be staying, and when I’ll return. Toodles!” I heard them falling over themselves as they tried to catch up to my quick stride.
They were LITERALLY trying to get ME to tell THEM what to do with their children! But I was having none of it and quickly closed the door before rushing to my car and driving away. Yes, I felt like I was escaping and running away from my responsibilities and I HATED that feeling!
When I arrived home, my DIL had left several voice messages that I had no intention of listening to. My therapist was the one who made me realize I was overworked and needed some time off. I was oblivious to that as I continued stretching myself to my limits.
She, my therapist, knocked it into my head that I was overcompensating by trying to be the best MIL and grandmother while losing myself. I stuck to my promise and sent George and Sarah all the details of my travels as a courtesy.
The next few weeks were filled with Sarah trying to convince me to leave with the kids. When she wasn’t trying to do that, she tried to get me to stay and not leave. “I need to do this for ME, Sarah. You won’t understand,” I explained, trying to get her off my back.
If my DIL wasn’t the one pestering me, my son got in on it. But with the words of my therapist playing in my head, “Stick to your guns. You are doing this for YOUR well-being,” I remained resolute in my decision.
When the fateful day came, I announced my departure to my son and left. For two glorious days on vacation, I had nothing but massages, long beach walks, drank piña coladas, and enjoyed the sunsets!
On the third day, my mood was spoiled when I suddenly received a disturbing message from my DIL. “George is on his business trip, my parents have house repairs, and I’m going on MY retreat,” her text began.
“And you know what? It’s in the Bahamas!! Isn’t it amazing? We’re already boarding, I need you to watch the kiddos!” Annoyed is an understatement for what I was feeling! I couldn’t understand, so HER parents have repairs, and I have a vacation, so I can babysit the kids?!
I was MAD AS HELL! I was practically seething! This time I leaned on my own faculties and decided to teach her a lesson on mutual respect. When they pitched, I was my usual affectionate self to my grandbabies and hugged and kissed them.
I then spent an hour bonding with the pair while Sarah mumbled about how SHE had to MEDITATE tomorrow. But the next day, I got an irritated call from her. “WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? WHERE ARE YOU?!” she had the nerve to demand.
All calm and relaxed as I had anticipated that type of response, I answered, “I’m at the spa, getting a massage. Why do you ask?” Sounding more frustrated, my DIL replied, “Why would you not answer your phone?!”
“The kids have been driving ME crazy, and I need a break!” I had finally had enough of her nonsense and took a deep breath before responding. “I hear you talking about what YOU need and want, but have you asked ME what my plans are?”
“Has it even occurred to YOU to find out if I WANT to babysit during MY vacation and time away?” I heard her gasp as she tried cutting in all respectful this time, saying, “Mrs. Thomas, I…” But I cut her off and continued my rant.
“Do you know what I am doing here, huh? Do you even CARE?” My voice went up a notch. “You receive what you deserve, Sarah. And maybe it’s time for YOU and George to learn a lesson about respect!”
My DIL was stunned into silence. She realized for the first time in two years the depth of her imposition. Her voice had softened as she stammered, “I… I didn’t think… I just assumed…”
I wasn’t done with her as I replied, “That’s exactly the problem we have, you assumed and KEEP assuming. I love my grandkids, but I also NEED my own time.”
“This was MY vacation. It’s time I took off so I can recuperate and have some self-care.” I could hear from the silence on the other side that Sarah was feeling guilty. She was FINALLY understanding where I was coming from.
“I’ve given you and Georgie two long years of my love and dedication.” I shared how I’d stretched myself because I wanted to be a good MIL and grandmother. I also wanted to be there for them as they transitioned into parenthood.
But then I went too far as they kept demanding more and more of my time. I confessed to my DIL that I started feeling burnt out. Yet, because I hadn’t felt the feeling before, I didn’t realize what was happening to me.
A friend I confided in suggested I see her therapist. That’s when it finally clicked that I was wearing myself thin. I was quite upset as I ended my rant by stating, “Next time, respect MY plans and ask, don’t just assume I’m here to serve your convenience!”
Sarah paused for a long time on the other end of the line and I was about to say something when she finally sighed. It appeared she finally understood the weight of my words and where I was coming from.
“You’re right. I’m sorry. I should have asked. I’ll make other arrangements,” my DIL replied, sounding defeated. I won’t lie, I felt a tinge of regret for how I approached things, but decided it was something that had to be done.
After all, as they say, people treat the way you teach them to. I thanked her for understanding. “Now, I’m going to enjoy the rest of my vacation. I suggest you find a way to enjoy yours too, without relying on me.”
I didn’t wait for a response before hanging up and felt the most serene wave of satisfaction! I had stood up for myself and drew boundaries that taught my DIL a valuable life lesson! I happily returned to my massage, content that I would not be disturbed anymore.
I felt the stress melt away from my body as the masseuse kneaded longstanding knots that had built up over the years. I was pleased to know that I had managed to reclaim my well-deserved break.
Unfortunately, Mrs. Thomas isn’t the only person who’s had to take measures to teach people important lessons. Mark’s mother kept nagging his pregnant wife to the point that the younger woman had to leave. Not wanting his mother to miss her mistake, Mark found a clever way to teach the parent about respect and boundaries.
Inside a ‘Dystopian’ Apartment Block Where That Houses Over 20,000 Residence
Deemed a “Dystopian Apartment,” a building in China has recently gone viral on TikTok. Incredibly, it has the ability to host up to 30,000 residents.
The video was posted by @fatheristheone using a drone and caught people’s attention for more than just the impressive interior and unique design.
People were also astonished after seeing footage that truly captivates the enormity of the building.
Many people have read at least one novel focusing on a Dystopian society. Or at least understand that it describes a society that lives in fear or has been dehumanized.
Most works have been fiction, although some might argue they’re a possible warning about the future.
Either way, China currently has an apartment building that can house up to 30,000 residents at one time. Furthermore, containing everything residents could possibly need.
Features of the Dystopian Apartment
The “dystopian” apartment, called the Regent International, is located in Qianjiang Century City, more specifically, in Hangzhou’s central business district.
The building was actually designed by Alicia Loo, chief designer of a 7-star hotel called the Singapore Sands Hotel, and was inaugurated in 2013.
Impressively, the building is 675 feet tall and is currently home to around 20,000 residents. It is an S-shape and has 36, or 39, floors depending upon which side of the building you are.
Unsurprisingly, it’s one of the most densely populated areas in the world, thanks to the numerous residents coexisting under one giant roof.
Within the more than 30 floors of the Regent International, there are a number of amenities. Some include restaurants, swimming pools, and nail salons.
The building also contains its own grocery stores and internet cafes. Essentially, anything one might find “in town” can be found indoors the “dystopian apartment”.
As a result, many residents may never step foot outside again. Posing the question, will they also never get any fresh air or feel the sunlight on their skin? First, the residents aren’t forced to stay indoors, nor are they forced to live in the “dystopian apartment.”
In contrast, most residents are young professionals and influencers or college students. Both of them greatly benefit from the cost-effectiveness and convenience of living in a place such as an S-shaped building.
Advantageous Living
Living there seems to be incredibly convenient for residents as they have everything they could possibly need under one roof.
Convenience isn’t the only advantage. Its affordability is another great benefit to living at Regent International.
Units vary in size and cost but range from 1,500 RMB, which is equivalent to around $200.00 per month, to 4,000 RMB, which is just under $600.00 per month.
While some are apprehensive, calling it a “dystopian apartment,” others have praised the innovation behind the building. It’s even been called “the most sustainable living building on earth.”
Another interesting advantage comes to light in the midst of a housing crisis that is seemingly sweeping the U.S. The “dystopian apartment” could serve as a model for how the U.S. can possibly create more living spaces for people without taking up copious amounts of land.
Interestingly, one state has already developed something like the hotel turned apartment city. Whittier, a city in Alaska, has a 14-floor building in which all 272 residents live. It, like the building in China, has everything one would find “in town.” This includes a church, school, post office, and police station.
Possible Downsides
Like everything in life, this, too, has pros and cons. After all, the building has been referred to as “dystopian apartment” for a reason.
As previously mentioned, many people are wondering how so many people can live in one place. U.S. residents tend to prefer privacy. Space from their neighbors. Even a yard to hang out in or for their dogs to play.
A major drawback to a housing solution like this is that people will have very little space of their own, with little opportunity to be outdoors or get fresh air. Luckily, the problem of getting fresh air can be remedied by taking a stroll or renting one of the larger units in the Regent International, as some come with balconies, providing some relief from living in there.
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