The underwear of my neighbor turned into the star of a suburban farce, stealing the show directly outside my son’s 8-year-old window. Jake’s innocent question about whether her thongs were slingshots made me realize that the “panty parade” needed to end and that it was time to teach her some prudence when doing the laundry.
Oh, suburbia: a place where everything seems perfect, the air filled with the scent of freshly cut grass, and life goes on without incident until someone changes everything. At that point, Lisa, our new neighbor, showed up. Everything had been rather quiet until wash day, when I saw something for the first time that had caught me off guard: a rainbow of her panties flapping outside Jake’s window like flags at a dubious parade.I nearly choked on my coffee one afternoon while folding Jake’s superhero underwear and happened to look out the window. And there they were, lacy and blazing pink and very much on show. Ever the inquisitive child, my son glanced over my shoulder and posed the dreaded query, “Mom, why is Mrs. Lisa wearing her underpants outside? And why are there strings on some of them? Are they for her hamster companion?I tried to explain between choked laughter and horrified astonishment. However, Jake’s imagination was running wild as he pondered whether Mrs. Lisa had aerodynamically engineered underpants and was indeed a superhero. He even expressed a desire to participate, proposing that his Captain America boxers be displayed next to her “crime-fighting gear.” Jake would get curious and Lisa’s laundry would flap in the breeze on a daily basis. But I realized it was time to terminate this farce when he offered to hang his own underpants next to hers. So, prepared to settle the dispute amicably, I marched over to her residence. Before I could say anything, Lisa answered the door and made it plain that she wasn’t going to break her laundry routine for anyone. She dismissed my worries with a laugh, advised me to “loosen up,” and even gave me style tips for my own clothes. Despite my frustration, I remained resolute and devised a cleverly trivial scheme. Using the brightest fabric I could find, I made the biggest, flashiest pair of granny panties ever that evening. When Lisa departed the following day, I hung my work of art directly in front of her window. When she came back, the sight of the enormous underwear with a flamingo print almost took her breath away. It was worth every stitch to watch her lose her cool trying to take down my practical joke. After a while, she gave in and agreed to shift her laundry somewhere less noticeable, all the while I silently celebrated my success. After that, Lisa’s laundry disappeared from our shared vision, and everything returned to normal. What about me? In the end, I had some flamingo-themed curtains that served as a constant reminder of the day I prevailed in the suburban laundry war.
PRAY FOR MELANIE GRIFFITH!
Melanie Griffith begs for prayers as her mother is evacuated from big cat sanctuary in path of ferocious LA wildfire that has gutted homes, destroyed 22,000 acres of land AND the set for Wipeout
Melanie Griffith asked for prayers after her mother was evacuated from a wildlife sanctuary because of raging wildfires in Los Angeles.
The actress wrote on Twitter: ‘Please say a prayer for all residents in the path of the #SandFire . My Moms place Shambala is being evacuated.’
Griffith’s 86-year-old mother, Tippi Hedren, opened the preserve in 1983 following on from her film Roar.
There are over 40 big cats – including lions, tigers, cougars, black and spotted leopards, servals, bobcats, and an Asian leopard cat – who are cared for at the ranch.
On Sunday evening, Griffith, 58, confirmed that her mom was safe and the beloved cats had been saved. She wrote: ‘Mom is safe! Shambala is safe. Now sending love and thanks to all the firefighters who saved her and the cats.’
They accept donations for The Roar Foundation, the organization that runs the center.
Sable Ranch – a filming set used in the A-Team, 24 and Supernatural and the site for the Wipeout set – has also been destroyed.
The blaze has grown ferocious new power two days after it broke out, sending so much smoke in the air that planes making drops on it had to be grounded.
Officials said it has run through the area ‘like a freight train’.
The latest figures released by the authorities say the blaze is at 20 percent containment and a total of 18 family homes have been gutted in the areas of Sand Canyon, Bear Divide and Little Tujunga.
On Saturday, authorities said the Sand Fire was at 20 per cent containment, but the U.S. Forest Service corrected that figure and said the fire remains at 10 per cent containment. Above firefighters battled the Sand Fire on Sunday
About 300 miles up the coast, crews were battling another blaze spanning 10,000 acres (16 square miles) north of the majestic Big Sur region.
Authorities say almost 1,700 firefighters who are being hindered by scorching temperatures of up to 112 degrees are battling the blaze in the mountains north of Los Angeles known as the Sand Fire.
On Sunday crews faced another day of hot weather, low humidity and high winds that could once again fan the fires’ explosive growth. Shifting winds sent smoke away from greater Los Angeles and into desert communities, where residents were warned about poor air quality.
Late Saturday evening, a man’s body was found outside a home on Iron Canyon Road in Santa Clarita. Detectives are working to determine whether he was killed by the blaze or another cause, Los Angeles County sheriff’s Lt. Rob Hahnlein said.
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