This time, we sent an air fryer to our youngest granddaughter, the cheapest thing on her registry. Eloise called us, livid, accusing us of being cheap. I remember picking up her call and she didn’t even say hi, she just started ranting, “Seriously, Grandma? I just got your gift. An air fryer? That’s the cheapest thing you could find on my registry!”
I was taken aback because as much as the air fryer was the cheapest on their registry, I still thought it’d be useful to them, so I told her that. Eloise kept on complaining, “Useful? Come on, you know you can do better than that. Everyone knows you have the money. I just can’t believe you’d be this cheap with me. It’s embarrassing.”
In this heated moment, I told her, “Yes, you’re right. We are cheap, old, and useless. The only thing you DIDN’T know is that the day before the wedding, we were going to gift you a check for $40,000.”
I revealed this in an attempt to explain to Eloise about the cash gift we usually give our grandkids before the wedding but she was so angry at this point, that she wasn’t listening to a thing I said. I speculated that maybe she didn’t believe we would gift her such an amount of money after only buying her an air fryer.
Eventually, she said, “No, it’s clear. You just don’t love me enough to show it. You know how much pressure I’m under with the wedding. And then, this? It’s like you don’t even care,” then she hung up.
Despite my husband and I’s shock at Eloise’s reaction, we then bought her a China set, hoping to appease her, but decided against giving her the $40,000, feeling she hadn’t earned it.
Fast forward to last week. Eloise talked to her brother and found out that we were telling her the truth about the money. After confirming it with her cousins, she, called again, accusing us of discrimination, “I just found out that it’s true you gave the money to everyone else when they got married. Why didn’t I get anything?”
We stood firm, explaining our stance was due to her initial reaction, “We felt after your reaction to the wedding gift, it wasn’t right to go ahead and gift you the money.” Eloise pleaded trying to convince us otherwise, “So, you’re punishing me? Is that it? Because I was upset about an air fryer?”
I was angry that she didn’t even understand what she did wrong. “It wasn’t about the air fryer, Eloise. It was how you spoke to us, the disrespect. That’s not something we expected or can support,” I explained.
Eloise implored us, nearly in tears, “But that’s so unfair! I was stressed, Grandma. Planning a wedding is hard, and I just snapped. I didn’t mean any of it.” I felt like she should have only apologized to us instead of finding excuses to justify her behavior.
However, I told her, “We understand that it’s a stressful time, but actions and words have consequences. We hoped you’d understand the value of family and love over material things.” Full of desperation, Eloise added, “But you don’t understand! Can’t we just forget all this happened? I need that money, Grandma.”
She pleaded, threatened to boycott Christmas, and accused us of cutting her off but we didn’t budge. In the end, I expressed, “We love you very much. This has nothing to do with cutting you off. We just hope you’ll reflect on this and understand why we made our decision.”
Now, Eloise has followed up on her threat and she’s boycotting Christmas. Her mother, who is our daughter-in-law, is siding with her, calling us unreasonable. However, we feel that after all we have done for Eloise, the air fryer gift, shouldn’t have triggered this reaction.
For context, we had already paid for her college, and her parents covered her graduate school and half the wedding. Additionally, she and her husband are financially comfortable and do not desperately need our money.
We’re also not upset with our grandkids for revealing the cash gift since she is among the group of family members who are allowed to know about it. Our reason for sending the air fryer earlier was that we live far away, so we always send our gifts early.
The wedding gift is also separate from the money, which we give with the hope it will be used for something significant, like a home. Now, we feel like the action we took towards Eloise was well deserved and we are not going back on our decisions even if she and her mom threaten to do their worst.
Despite the tumultuous events and Eloise’s refusal to understand our perspective, my husband and I stand by our decision. Love and respect in our family are paramount, and we hoped this situation would be a learning experience for her.
The holidays might be quieter this year with her family’s absence, but our hope is for healing and understanding in the future. Our door and hearts remain open to Eloise, whenever she’s ready to mend fences.
Want more like this? Click here to read about a grandmother who sparked controversy online because she doesn’t bring her grandchildren gifts when she visits.
10 Hairstyles That Can Ruin Even a Flawless Look
Even the most elaborate look can be spoiled by a bad hairstyle which can easily make you look 10 years older, distort your facial features or even your body. We’ve put together 10 hairstyles that are worth avoiding.
Contrasting coloring
Contrast coloring is considered outdated. Nowadays, more natural and soft transitions are in vogue. Smooth and barely noticeable accents on individual strands look much more refined and sophisticated, adding freshness to your look and volume to your hair.
Blunt bob with baby bangs
Recently, some celebrities returned to a controversial trend from the 1990s and got very short bangs. However, stylists believe that women after 40 should avoid baby bangs because these can make them look older.
Straight bangs that reach eyebrows
Many people believe that these bangs help you visually correct the height of the forehead and make the face more symmetrical. But it can play a bad joke on your appearance — it can visually age a person and steal hair volume.
Complicated braids
We are used to seeing Rosamund Pike with short, straight hair. But recently, the actress appeared in public with a slightly longer hairstyle. But it doesn’t always look up-to-date, like these braids, for example.
Currently, complicated braids are giving way to simpler hairstyles. The more natural and careless hairstyle with braids is better.
Unnatural hair coloring
Hilary Duff decided to make drastic changes in her looks after the divorce from her first husband, and we can understand that. But bright, unnatural colors, like blue, green, or pink, are becoming less and less popular. More muted shades that emphasize individuality without being too extravagant are in fashion now.
Middle-parted, chin-length bobm
Hair stylists believe that this bob often emphasizes fine lines, wrinkles and signs of thinning hair on mature women. It’s best to opt for a bob with a side parting or a pixie cut.
Bob with blunt bangs
Experts believe that this haircut can visually add age. The length of the bangs is key here. If it covers the eyebrows, it highlights signs of aging. In addition, the jaw seems more massive than it really is.
Shaved sides
Haircuts with shaved sides were at the peak of popularity 15 years ago, but now they are losing their positions. Many people believe that this type of haircut distorts the appearance.
But Tilda Swinton just loves short haircuts and has stayed loyal to them for many years. Let’s look at the photos above: in the left photo, the actress’s sides look too short, while in the right photo, the hair softly frames her face.Thick side-swept bangs
Thick side-swept bangs
These bangs tend to distort facial features because they can easily cover one eye. In addition, they draw attention to skin imperfections.
Mallet
The mallet hairstyle can be roughly described as «shorter in the front, longer in the back.» Modern fashion trends tend to favor more harmonious and versatile haircuts that can be easily adapted to different looks.
And here are hairstyle tips that can help you enhance your facial features.
Preview photo credit Invision/Invision/East News, zz/Pluto/STAR MAX/IPx/Associated Press/East News, Vianney Le Caer/Invision/East News
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