There are so many things in the world that we may admire or even get inspired by, but there’s one main thing we may want to fall in love with before we start noticing the beauty of other things. It’s our own reflection in the mirror. Among all the numerous recipes for conjuring up self-love within ourselves, psychologists advise us to never compare ourselves to others and stop caring about other people’s opinions. Actress and producer Lena Dunham knows a lot about cultivating love for her own body despite all the criticism she faced, and she happily shares her journey with us all.
Lena Dunham doesn’t accept the term “body positivity,” and here’s why.
Actress and writer Lena Dunham has recently added another string to her bow and collaborated with the brand 11 Honoré to create a plus-size clothing collection. But the very term “plus size” frustrates Lena, and so is the term “body positivity.” In one of her Instagram posts, she explains that she feels more “body tolerant” than “body positive.”
In her interview, Dunham said, “The thing that’s complicated about the body-positive movement is it can be for the privileged few who have a body that looks the way people want to feel positive. We want curvy bodies that look like Kim Kardashian has been up-sized slightly. We want big beautiful butts and big beautiful breasts and no cellulite and faces that look like you could smack them onto thin women.”
Dunham has a very special relationship with her own body.
Dunhams path to self-love started with a decade-long journey with endometriosis. Since she started her own fight against it, she has been candidly sharing how it influenced both her emotional health and her relationship with her own body image. In her Instagram post, she emotionally described how she fluctuated between loving her body and the opposite.
She wrote, “Ya know when you’re home alone, and you realize you’d be happier in a hot lil’ onesie than your ketchup and cat food stained pajamas? And it’s not about a boy or a photo shoot or a weight loss before-and-after, it’s just for the feeling of glee you get from dressing your one and only corporeal form in pleasing fabrics, the unique pleasure of admiring the twists and turns of the body that loves the heck out of you even when you don’t love it.”
Dunham is powerfully addressing all people who come to her page with criticism.
In 2021, Dunham tied the knot with musician Luis Felber. It was such a darling event for her that she wore 3 wedding dresses to marry her love and shared the photos on her Instagram. However, she started getting some “gnarly” comments in her feed from people who commented on her body and appearance. The actress didn’t hesitate for a minute to address them with a powerful message.
She wrote, “One narrative I take issue with, largely because it’s a story I don’t want other women, other people, to get lodged in their heads, is that I should somehow be criticized because my body has changed since I was last on television. […] But lastly, when will we learn to stop equating thinness with health/happiness?”
Dunham’s powerful message can be echoed in the hearts of many.
For all people who have ever hesitated about embracing their body image, Dunham has some simple yet wise advice. She says, “Of course weight loss can be the result of positive change in habits, but guess what? So can weight gain. The pics I’m being compared to are from when I was with an undiagnosed illness. In the last 4 years, I’ve begun my life as someone who aspires toward health and not just achievement.
These changes have allowed me to be the kind of sister/friend/daughter that I want to be and yes — meet my husband (who, by the way, doesn’t recognize me in those old photos because he sees how dimmed my light was). I say this for any other person whose appearance has been changed with time, illness, or circumstance — it’s okay to live in your present body without treating it as transitional. I am, and I’m really enjoying it. Love you all.”
Do you find Lena Dunham’s example inspiring? What do you love the most about your appearance?
Preview photo credit Steve Granitz / WireImage / Getty Images, lenadunham / Instagram
My Cheating Husband Told Me I am Hideous And Ugly. I Gave him a Taste of His Own Medicine
I still remember the day vividly. His words cut deeper than any blade ever could. “You should be grateful I stay with you because nobody else could stand looking at that hideous face every day.” His cruel comment replayed in my mind like a broken record. At 67, I knew I wasn’t as young as I once was, but I had always believed in my inner and outer beauty. When I dressed up and put effort into my appearance, I still caught a look or two from strangers. His betrayal and harsh words completely shattered my self-esteem.
I was devastated. This was the man I had loved, the father of our four children, the person I had devoted my life to. How could he be so cruel? For days, I was in a daze, hurt and saddened by his words and actions. But then, a realization hit me. This man didn’t love me anymore. He thought that because we were old, he could do whatever he wanted without consequences.
“Okay, Mister Martin,” I thought to myself. “Let’s play it your way. I will make you regret this.”
The Perfect Facade
For the next three days, I played the role of the perfect wife. I served him his meals on time, cleaned the house meticulously, and even showed him extra respect. The satisfaction on his petty little face was almost unbearable. He thought he had won, that he had put me in my place. Little did he know, I was just setting the stage for what was to come.
Behind the scenes, I was planning my revenge. I spent hours researching and thinking of ways to hit him where it hurt the most. The first step was to gather evidence of his infidelity. With the help of a private investigator, I collected photographs, messages, and even videos of his escapades.
The Day of Reckoning
The very next day after my perfect facade, I executed my plan. It started like any other day. I made him breakfast, kissed him goodbye as he left for work, and waited patiently. When he came home, he was greeted by our children, all four of them. They had no idea what was about to happen, but I needed them there for what was to come next.
I gathered everyone in the living room and handed out envelopes containing the evidence of his infidelity. As they opened them, the room filled with gasps and shocked expressions. Martin’s face turned from confusion to horror as he realized what was happening.
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“Martin, you thought you could humiliate me and get away with it?” I said, my voice steady and strong. “You thought I would just sit back and let you walk all over me? You’re wrong. I’ve had enough.”
I looked at our children, their eyes wide with disbelief. “This man,” I continued, “has betrayed not only me but our entire family. He doesn’t deserve our love or respect.”
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