Wife: Honey, would you mind clearing the garden for me?
Spouse: Do I appear to be a landscaper?
SLAZY PARTNER! (HAHA STORY)
Spouse: I’m sorry, sweetie. So, how about we take care of the bathroom door?
Spouse: Do I appear to be a carpenter?
The spouse leaves the tasks unfinished when he leaves. Later, he comes back to find the bathroom door mended and the lawn well-kept.
Wife: I knew she would take care of things on her own!
Wife: I wasn’t the one responsible.
Wife: Honestly? Who then carried it out?
Wife: The woman next door.
Spouse: What was the amount you gave him?
Wife: He had no desire for money. I have two choices from him now: bread or sex.
Spouse: I hope you fed him some bread!
Wife: Do I appear to be from a bakery?
MY DAUGHTER TOLD ME NOT TO MAKE A FOOL OF MYSELF AFTER I FULFILLED THE DREAM OF MY LIFE
I’m 65. Growing up, I was always under strict rules—first from my parents and then from an abusive husband. But now, finally single with my kids all grown up, I decided it was time to do something just for me. I’ve always dreamt of adding a bit of brightness to my life, so I dyed my hair pink, feeling like I’m embracing the winter of my life with some warmth.
But the moment my daughter saw me, she was furious. She yelled, telling me I looked ridiculous and that I should stay OUT OF SIGHT.
Is it really too much? I’ve never felt so happy and free. But maybe she’s right, and I should act my age instead.
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