Finding ways to celebrate a loved one’s memory becomes vital for many after they pass away, as losing a loved one is always a tough event. While flower arrangements and other tributes are typical, there is a specific meaning associated with laying pennies on gravestones, especially for veterans and service members and their families.
A Tradition Worth Keeping
Though its exact roots are unknown, some have speculated that the custom of laying coins on gravestones originated during the Roman Empire. However, according to Snopes, there is insufficient evidence to back up this assertion. However, one thing is certain: people who have a strong bond with military people are aware of the sacrifices they make and are looking for a significant way to remember their lost colleagues.
It became increasingly difficult for people to express their emotions honestly during the Vietnam War. It became customary to place a coin on a soldier’s tomb to signify that someone had paid them a visit without running the danger of awkward talks regarding the political sides of the conflict. The gesture was a straightforward but effective way for people to express respect and unity.
Symbolic Honor Representations
Every penny placed on a gravestone has a special meaning associated with it. Here are few instances:
A penny is a sign that someone has paid their respects and visited the tomb.
Deeper emotional significance can be derived from a nickel, which represents a bond between the individual who left it and the dead soldier from boot camp.
A dime signifies cooperation, even if it was just briefly before splitting up.
The most important coin, the quarter, acts as a monument by informing the bereaved family that the person who left the coin was there during their time of grief.
These coins remind us of the sacrifices made by those who serve in the military and act as tangible representations of respect and tribute, bridging the gap between the past and present.
Past Gravestones
Not all military traditions involve coins, such as placing money on gravestones. Military troops are big fans of challenge coins, which have no monetary worth but are extremely significant. These coins, which stand for oneness, are frequently traded as trophies of friendship and honor.
Throughout history, coins have also had a variety of roles in cultural practices. They have been regarded as representations of good fortune, giving, and even riches. While this isn’t always the case, some people in the past were buried with their riches. For instance, it’s been reported that two dollars and fifty cents were buried with Abraham Lincoln’s eyes covered.
The deeper significance of laying pennies on gravestones is to commemorate and recognize the extraordinary efforts made by those who are serving in the military and their families, even though there may not be a clear relationship between money and this practice. It serves as a reminder to ourselves that their sacrifices are priceless.
My Entitled Parents Demanded That I Give Them My New House — My In-Laws Suddenly Stood up for Me
When Carina’s parents kick her out after high school, she has no choice but to navigate her way around life. Years later, after making a success of her life, and her wedding is around the corner, she reaches out to them, only for them to storm into her life, trying to take ownership of what she has worked so hard for.
“Carina,” my mother said, opening a packet of biscuits. “You’re going to regret not going to medical school.”
“Mom,” I replied. “My brain doesn’t work like Jade’s; she’s the doctor in the family, not me.”
A packet of biscuits | Source: Midjourney
“I don’t see why it can’t be the both of you,” she sniffed, dunking a biscuit into her lukewarm tea. “Why do you even waste your time with computers? Those machines are not going to make your life comfortable.”
This wasn’t anything new. My parents hated that I loved computers, and when school was out in the next few months, I was going to be off to college, studying IT.
A girl sitting with a laptop and headphones | Source: Midjourney
“Who cares about cyber security, Carina?” my father asked while he sat down with a pork chop. “Saving people’s lives, honey. That’s what success is. Not playing on computers.”
“Cyber security is how your important details are protected, Dad,” I would always say, rolling my eyes. “It’s how countries keep their people safe.”
Pork chops on a plate | Source: Unsplash
“It’s not good enough,” my mother said from the sink.
After graduation, my parents made me leave the house.
“You’ve chosen this path,” my mother said when I bought my IT textbooks. “So you’re capable of taking care of yourself.”
A pile of books | Source: Midjourney
“I don’t think that’s fair, Mom,” I retaliated. “You let Jade live at home for her whole degree.”
“Yeah, well, she was learning how to save lives, Carina,” she said.
A woman looking through a microscope | Source: Pexels
Fast forward 13 years. I’ve got a successful career, a beautiful house, and the most caring fiancé, Mark, I could have ever asked for.
“Are you sure that I should invite my parents to the wedding?” I asked Mark as we took a walk one evening.
“Yes, darling,” he said, taking my hand. “Why wouldn’t you? I’m so proud of who you are and where you’ve come from. You’ve done all of this on your own.”
A couple holding hands | Source: Pexels
“But they’ve been such horrible people, Mark. I mean, they kicked me out of their home when I got into college. I had to work as a dog groomer to make enough money to cover the rent for my tiny apartment,” I said.
“Yes, I understand that,” my fiancé said diplomatically. “But you’ve made it now. And you’ve made it without them. Look, honey. Our home is yours; it’s in your name, and I love that for us.”
A person grooming a dog | Source: Pexels
Eventually, I gave in. The excitement of our wedding planning made me realize that I was proud of myself and where I had come from.
“I did it without their support,” I told Mark as I fried bacon for us one morning. “So, I’m going to invite them.”
Mark smiled at me while he poured milk into his coffee.
A person pouring milk into coffee | Source: Unsplash
“Good, this is a big moment for us,” he said.
When my parents and sister arrived, they were stunned by my house. They assumed that I was renting a room of the house. Of course, they didn’t think that I was capable of something bigger and better than that.
A beautiful home with a large garden | Source: Midjourney
“Carina! You own this entire house?” my father asked, his eyes wide with disbelief.
“Yes, Dad,” I said, wheeling my mother’s suitcase in, they seemed to think that they were spending the night. “I worked hard for this.”
A suitcase in a living room | Source: Midjourney
“Wow, I didn’t expect this,” my sister said, looking around.
“So, I thought that we could do dinner at a restaurant tonight, and then come home for dessert and coffee. You guys can spend time with Mark and my in-laws.”
They were going to be over at any moment, the first meet and greet almost underway.
But that’s when the entitlement kicked in.
A beautiful living room | Source: Unsplash
My mother’s eyes narrowed as she scanned the living room, taking in my television and other things.
“You know, Carina,” she declared, her tone leaving no room for argument. “We deserve to live in comfort after all we’ve done for you.”
Then, she promptly sat down on the couch.
An older woman sitting | Source: Pexels
“Mom, what are you talking about?” I was incredulous. “This is my home. I bought it with my own money. You did absolutely nothing for me after high school.”
“But we’re your parents,” she insisted. “We should live better than our children. It’s our right. It’s the only right thing.”
“You can’t be serious,” I said, my voice rising. “Jade still lives with you because you wanted to baby her after her night shifts. And me? You didn’t care. This isn’t my responsibility.”
An older woman looking around | Source: Pexels
My father stepped in at this point, crossing his arms.
“After everything we’ve sacrificed for you, this is the least you can do.”
“Jade needs a place to stay, too,” my mother said.
“Jade is an adult,” I snapped. “She made her choice to live with you, just like I made my own.”
An older man | Source: Unsplash
I felt bad that I was speaking about Jade in this way, especially because she was sitting on the couch and looking at my plants.
But my sister had chosen my parents when they kicked me out. She barely kept in contact with me, only stopping to text me on my birthday or Christmas morning.
A woman sitting on a couch | Source: Unsplash
At that moment, the door opened, and my future in-laws walked in. I had always been close to them, wanting to find parental figures in Mark’s parents.
“We’ve been hearing this entire conversation from outside,” Tom said.
“Carina’s achievements are hers,” my future mother-in-law, Carol, said firmly. “She’s worked hard for this, and she deserves every bit of it.”
A smiling woman holding a bouquet of flowers | Source: Pexels
My mother turned to her, eyes blazing.
“Who the hell are you? We have rights to this house; she’s our daughter.”
Carol didn’t flinch; she stood with her arms folded, a smile playing across her face.
“Why did you remember that only now? Where have you been all these years? Being her parents doesn’t mean that you can take credit for her hard work. Carina has earned this.”
An angry old woman | Source: Pexels
My parents were stunned into silence, and Jade couldn’t even look up.
“Carina invited you to celebrate her wedding, to celebrate the union of her and our son. To join our families. She did not invite you to berate her and have her hard work claimed,” Tom said.
“She owes you nothing but respect because you raised her, but that doesn’t mean giving up her home,” Carol said.
A young mother and daughter | Source: Pexels
“But we’re her family,” my mother said, clearly not expecting this level of pushback.
“Only by blood,” Mark said, stepping into the house. “Family supports one another. They don’t tear you down. And that’s what you’ve done to Carina for years.”
“You should be so proud of your girl,” Carol continued. “She’s done so much for us. I am so proud of her. Tom, too. She’s the daughter that I wanted all along.”
A smiling man | Source: Pexels
Mark found his way to me, wrapping his arm around my waist.
I looked at my parents, seeing the dawning realization on their faces.
“I love you, I do,” I said. “But this is my life, and you’ve only been in it again for five minutes, and you’re already demanding things of me. Is that fair? I’ve worked too hard to let anyone take that away from me.”
My father sighed heavily.
An elderly man looking down | Source: Unsplash
“We didn’t mean to upset you,” he said.
“Then respect my choice,” I said gently. “Be present for my wedding, but after that, you can go your own way again.”
After the confrontation, my parents seemed to understand, if only a little.
A bride holding a card | Source: Pexels
When we left to the restaurant, everyone was subdued, except for Mark and my in-laws. I didn’t see a point in canceling the dinner because of the confrontation.
We sat down to eat, everyone lost in their own thoughts while Carol made comments about seeing me in my dress.
“Mark, you’re in for such a treat. Carina looks beautiful in that dress,” she said, digging into her salmon.
I smiled at my future mother-in-law. I always knew that she loved me, but her comments of the day had truly made me realize just how much.
A bride with wedding dresses | Source: Pexels
I was lucky. I had gotten lucky with Mark, but even more so with his parents.
I watched as my mother’s face fell when Carol went on, talking about the dress fitting. But I didn’t have it in me to make her feel better.
After dinner, we left the restaurant, parting ways with my parents and sister.
“We’ll see you at the wedding,” my father said, getting into the car.
“Yes,” I said. “I’ll see you then.”
A man sitting in a car | Source: Pexels
Let’s see what happens at my wedding.
What would you have done?
If you enjoyed this story, here’s another one for you:
Claire just wants to be the glamorous mother-of-the-groom—but when she realizes that her daughter-in-law has her own plans for the wedding, she steps back to focus on her own outfit, only for there to be a fight between her and Alice on the big day. Alice claims that Claire has destroyed the wedding by stealing her dream dress, while Claire sees nothing wrong in her actions. Who is wrong?
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
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