Tuesday marks the 91st birthday for Kim Novak, the star of Alfred Hitchcock’s 1958 film Vertigo, who walked away from Hollywood over five decades ago.
“She’s spending her birthday having a picnic on her property with friends and lots of fudge,” says her longtime manager and close friend Sue Cameron.
Life is sweet these days for Novak, who lives quietly on the Oregon coast, surrounded by her beloved horses.
In honor of her 91st birthday, read on for an interview from 2021 in which Novak shared why she left Hollywood and found her true self.
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Over 50 years ago, Kim Novak, the enigmatic star of Alfred Hitchcock’s Vertigo, walked away from Hollywood. The woman who had once been the No. 1 box office draw in the world put her belongings in a van and drove north, first to Carmel, California and then two decades later to Oregon, to live her life as an artist.
“I had to leave to survive,” she tells PEOPLE. “It was a survival issue.”
“I lost a sense of who I truly was and what I stood for,” says Novak in a rare interview to talk about her new book, Kim Novak : Her Art and Life. published by the Butler Museum of American Art.
“I fought all the time back in Hollywood to keep my identity so you do whatever you have to do to hold on to who you are and what you stand for,” she explains.
“I’ve never done one of those tell-all books that they wanted me to do for so long, and I thought this is the kind of book I’d like to do,” she says of her art book. “Actually, I had written my autobiography and it was almost complete but I had a house fire and the house burned down and I made no copies. I just couldn’t go through it again because I had spent so much time. But it was okay because it was a catharsis just to do it.”
After starring in Picnic (1955) with William Holden, The Man With the Golden Arm (1955) and Pal Joey (1957), opposite Frank Sinatra, and Vertigo, with Jimmy Stewart, Novak was at the height of her career but still under the control of the studio.
As she writes in her book’s introduction, “I was both dazzled and disturbed to see me being packaged as a Hollywood sex symbol. However, I did win my fight over identity. I wouldn’t allow [Columbia Pictures chief] Harry Cohn to take my bohemian roots away by denying me my family name. Novak. I stood my ground and won my first major battle.”
Cohn wanted her to change her name to Kit Marlowe, telling her that audiences would be turned off by her Eastern European roots. She refused. In the late ’50s, she defied him again when she began dating singer Sammy Davis Jr. against his wishes and she fought to live her life as an independent woman.
“There was constant pressure to be seen and not heard,” writes Novak, “especially if you had a pretty face.”
“In Hollywood a lot of people assume who you are, because of the character you play, but also just because of who they expect you to be, how they expect you to dress,” she says. “It influences you because if you’re in some gorgeous sequined gown, you can’t run along the ocean and run on the beaches.”
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“I kept feeling like I was going deeper and deeper, lost in almost like a quicksand, where it’s swallowing you up, your own personality, and I’d started to wonder who I am,” she explains. “I realized needed to save myself.”
She found peace living and painting in the Rogue River Valley of Oregon and notes, “I needed the Pacific Ocean to inspire me, the animals, the beauty.”
“I wanted to live a normal life and a life with animals,” says the actress, who had always loved drawing and painting as a young girl growing up in Chicago. She was awarded two scholarships to the Chicago Art Institute before she was spotted by a talent scout on a trip to L.A. and her life changed course.
Once she left Hollywood, Novak returned to her twin passions: art and animals. “My teachers were the animals, not just dogs and cats, but other animals, horses and llamas, whom you have to meet half way, because they’re not ready to accept humans. I had to learn to win them over,” she says. “They understand a person who’s genuine so I had to become more real and that made me rely on my inner self — and that also encouraged me to paint. Everything seemed to flow from that.”
“You learn how to count on, not how you look, which is a big thing as a movie star, especially if you were recognized because of how you look,” she adds. “That can be a difficult thing when you change — but looks had nothing to do with it.”
She met second husband, Robert Malloy, an equine veterinarian, in the late ’70s, when he paid her a house call to treat one of her Arabian horses. She called him her “soul mate.” He died last December.
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“I don’t feel 87,” says Novak. “I don’t keep tract of the time. If I did, I’d be an old lady and I’m not an old lady. I’m still riding my horse. I stay as healthy as I can.”
In 2012, Novak revealed she’d been living with bipolar disorder. “I don’t mind being open about who I am because these are all characteristics which make you who you are, especially as an artist,” she says. “Now, of course, I have medication for it but the best medicine of all is art.”
She’s proud of her favorite films, including Vertigo and Bell, Book and Candle (1958), and has fond memories, especially of her friend and costar Jimmy Stewart. Says Novak: “He didn’t let Hollywood change who he was.”
“People can remember me in movies but I want them to see me as an artist,” says Novak, whose paintings were exhibited at a 2019 retrospective at the Butler Museum in Youngstown, Ohio. “What’s great about painting is, you become the director too. No one’s telling you how to do it. You get to direct the whole thing.”
“I’ve been influenced a lot by Hitchcock in my work because he did mysteries and at first glance, I want my painting to be a mystery,” she says. “I love being the director, the producer, the actor in my paintings.”
“This is who I am. I want people to see I was not just a movie star.”
Looking back, Novak says, “I’m so glad I didn’t do the tell-all book, where you write all about your love life. That wasn’t who I was. This book tells who I am. I just needed to be free.”
High School Sweethearts Planned to Meet in Times Square 10 Years Later — Instead, a 10-Year-Old Girl Approached Him There
“Ten years from now, Christmas Eve, Times Square. I promise I’ll be there,” Peter vowed to his high school sweetheart Sally on prom night. A decade later, he showed up with hope in his heart. But instead of Sally, a young girl approached, bearing a crushing truth that would change his life forever.
The music was soft, a gentle hum of violins blending with the muffled laughter of their classmates. Peter tightened his grip on Sally’s hands, his thumbs brushing over her knuckles like he could memorize her touch. Her mascara had smudged from crying, black streaks lining her flushed cheeks.
“I don’t want to go,” she said, her voice breaking.
A romantic couple at a prom | Source: Midjourney
Peter’s eyes glistened, fighting back tears he refused to shed. “I know,” he breathed, pulling her closer. “God, Sally, I don’t want you to go either. But some dreams are bigger than us.”
“Are they?” Sally challenged, her green eyes fierce with emotion. “What about our dream? What about everything we planned?” Her fingers intertwined with his.
“You must go,” Peter whispered. “Your family, your dreams… You’ve always wanted to study in Europe. I can’t hold you back. I won’t be the reason you shrink your world.”
A tear escaped, trailing down Sally’s cheek. “But what about us?” Her voice cracked, those three words carrying the weight of every shared moment, every stolen kiss, and every promise they’d ever made.
An emotional, teary-eyed young woman | Source: Midjourney
He pulled her closer, the space between them shrinking to nothing. “We’ll meet again,” he said, his voice steady despite the chaos inside.
“If we ever lose touch, promise me we’ll meet on Christmas Eve, ten years from now… at Times Square,” Sally whispered, a trembling smile breaking through her tears. “I’ll be holding a yellow umbrella. That’s how you’ll find me.”
“Ten years from now, Christmas Eve, Times Square. Even if life takes us separate ways, I promise I’ll be there, looking for the most beautiful lady with a yellow umbrella, no matter what,” Peter vowed.
Sally’s laugh was bitter, tinged with heartbreak. “Even if we’re married or have kids? You must come… just to talk. And to tell me that you’re happy and successful.”
“Especially then,” Peter responded, his fingers gently wiping away her tears. “Because some connections transcend time and circumstances.”
A sad young man with his eyes downcast | Source: Midjourney
They held each other in the middle of the dance floor, the world moving around them… two hearts beating in perfect, painful synchronization, knowing that some goodbyes are really just elaborate see-you-laters.
Time passed like leaves on a breeze. Peter and Sally remained in touch, mainly through letters. Then one day, she stopped writing. Peter was crushed, but the hope of meeting her kept him going.
Ten years later, Times Square sparkled with Christmas lights and the buzz of holiday cheer.
Peter stood near the towering Christmas tree, hands stuffed into the pockets of his coat. Snowflakes danced in the air, melting as they landed on his dark hair. His eyes scanned the crowd, searching for a flash of yellow.
A man standing on the street | Source: Midjourney
He hadn’t seen her in years, but he knew he’d recognize her anywhere. Sally was unforgettable. The way her laughter bubbled up when she teased him, the way her nose scrunched when she read something too serious… he remembered it all.
Each passing moment was a thread of memory, pulling tight around his heart.
The crowds shifted and swirled, tourists and locals mixing in a kaleidoscope of holiday excitement. Peter’s watch ticked away. First minutes, then an hour. The yellow umbrella remained a phantom, always just out of sight. Then suddenly, someone called out from behind.
The voice was small and hesitant. So small it could have been carried away by the winter wind. He turned sharply, his heart pounding so hard he could hear its rhythm in his ears.
A man looking at someone | Source: Midjourney
A little girl stood behind him, a yellow umbrella clutched in her hands. Her brown curls framed her pale face, her eyes wide and impossibly familiar as they met his.
“Are you Peter?” she asked, softer this time, as if afraid of breaking some delicate spell.
Peter crouched to her level, his mind a whirlwind of confusion. His hands, usually steady, trembled slightly as he met her gaze. “Yes, I’m Peter. Who are you?”
The girl bit her lip, a gesture so achingly reminiscent of someone he once knew that it made his breath catch. She shifted her weight from foot to foot, the yellow umbrella wobbling slightly in her small hands.
“My name’s Betty,” she whispered. “She… she’s not coming.”
A sad girl holding an umbrella | Source: Midjourney
A chill that had nothing to do with the winter air crept up Peter’s spine. Something in her eyes, in the careful way she held herself, spoke of a story far more complicated than a chance encounter.
“Wh-what do you mean? Who are you?” he asked, the words coming out more like a plea than a question.
“I’M YOUR DAUGHTER,” she whispered. Tears welled in her eyes. They were green… startlingly, unmistakably green. The same shade he remembered from a dance floor a decade ago.
Peter’s chest tightened, a vise of emotion squeezing around his heart. “Mmm-My Daughter?” he managed, though some part of him already knew the answer would change everything.
A shocked man | Source: Midjourney
Before Betty could respond, an older couple approached. The man was tall, his hair silver, and the woman clutched his arm, her face kind but etched with a sorrow that seemed to have carved permanent lines around her eyes and mouth.
“We found him,” Betty said, her voice brimming with nervousness and expectation.
The man nodded and turned to Peter, his gaze steady and penetrating. “Hello, Peter,” he said, his voice deep and measured. “I’m Felix and this is my wife. We’re Sally’s parents. We’ve heard so much about you.”
Peter froze, confusion swirling in his mind like a storm threatening to break. His legs felt unsteady, and his heart raced with dread. “I don’t understand,” he whispered. “Where’s Sally? And what does this girl mean by she’s ‘my daughter?’”
A sad older couple | Source: Midjourney
The older woman’s lip quivered, a fragile movement that spoke volumes. Her words fell like stones, each one shattering a piece of Peter’s world. “She passed away two years ago. Cancer.”
Peter staggered back as if the words had physically struck him. “No… No, that can’t be true,” he repeated, the denial a desperate prayer.
“I’m sorry,” Mr. Felix said softly, his voice laden with a compassion that felt like a gentle, merciless embrace. “She… she didn’t want you to know.”
Betty’s small hand tugged on Peter’s sleeve, a lifeline in a moment of emotional destruction. “Before she died, Mom told me you loved her like she was the most precious thing in the world,” she whispered, her voice filled with childlike innocence.
An emotional girl looking up at someone | Source: Midjourney
Peter sank to his knees again, the world spinning around him. His voice trembled, each word a broken piece of a shattered dream. “Why didn’t she tell me? About you? About her illness? Why didn’t she let me help?”
Mrs. Felix stepped forward, her hands clasped. “She found out she was pregnant with your child after she moved to Paris,” she explained. “She didn’t want to burden you. She knew your mother was sick, and you had so much on your plate. She thought you’d moved on, that you were happy.”
“Happy?” Peter’s laugh was a raw, broken sound. “But I never stopped loving her,” he said, his voice breaking like glass, sharp and painful. “Never.”
An emotional man holding his head | Source: Midjourney
Mrs. Felix pulled a small, worn diary from her bag. “We found this after she passed,” she said softly, her fingers brushing the faded cover with a tenderness that spoke of countless moments of grief and remembrance.
“She wrote about you, about how excited she was to see you again today… at this particular spot. That is how we knew. She… she never stopped loving you, Peter.”
Peter took the diary with hands that trembled like autumn leaves, each movement careful, almost reverent. The pages were filled with Sally’s neat handwriting — a beautiful script that seemed to dance between lines of hope and heartbreak.
His fingers traced the words, each paragraph a window into a love that had never truly died.
A man holding an old brown diary | Source: Midjourney
A photograph from their prom night fell between the pages — young Sally and Peter, lost in each other’s eyes, the world around them nothing more than a soft, indistinct backdrop.
Pressed carefully between paragraphs describing Betty’s dreams and Sally’s deepest regrets, the picture was a silent token to a love that had endured despite impossible circumstances.
Tears blurred his vision, transforming the words into a watercolor of emotion. Sally’s hopes, her fears, her extraordinary love… all captured in these fragile pages. He looked up, meeting Betty’s wide, nervous eyes. Eyes that held Sally’s spirit and her courage.
“You’re my daughter!” Peter whispered, the words a revelation, a prayer, and a promise all at once.
A little girl standing on the street | Source: Midjourney
Betty nodded, her small chin lifting with a courage that reminded him so much of her mother. “Mom said I look like you,” she responded, a hint of both vulnerability and pride in her voice.
Peter pulled her into a hug, holding her as tightly as he dared, as if he could protect her from every pain, every loss, and every moment of uncertainty she might ever face.
“You look like your mom too, sweetheart,” he murmured, a small smile flickering on his face. “You’re just as beautiful as she was.”
Betty nestled into his embrace, finding a home she didn’t know she’d been searching for.
A man smiling | Source: Midjourney
They talked for hours. Betty told him stories her mom had shared, each line a precious thread weaving together the mosaic of a life he’d missed.
Her animated gestures, the way her eyes lit up when she spoke about Sally, reminded Peter of everything he’d lost and found in a single moment.
“Mom used to tell me how you’d dance in the rain,” Betty said, her fingers tracing an invisible pattern. “She said you were the only person who could make her laugh during the hardest times.”
Mrs. Felix stepped closer, her hand resting gently on Peter’s shoulder. “Sally was protecting you,” she said softly, her voice carrying the weight of untold sacrifices. “She didn’t want you to feel trapped. She did what she did for you, dear.”
A cheerful girl laughing | Source: Midjourney
Peter wiped his face, his tears freezing on his cheeks like crystallized memories. “I would’ve dropped everything for her,” he whispered.
Mr. Felix’s eyes glistened with unshed tears. “We know that now,” he said. “And we’re sorry for not finding you sooner.”
Peter looked at Betty, her face a beautiful blend of wonder and sadness, a living reminder of the love he’d lost and found. “I’m never letting you go,” he said, the promise a sacred vow. “Not until I die.”
She smiled, shy but hopeful, her green eyes — Sally’s eyes — meeting his. “Promise?”
“I promise,” Peter said.
A man holding a little girl’s hand | Source: Midjourney
Over the following months, Peter worked tirelessly to bring Betty to the U.S. The process was complicated, filled with paperwork and emotional hurdles, but his determination never wavered. She moved into his apartment, her laughter (so reminiscent of Sally’s) filling the once-quiet spaces.
“This was Mom’s favorite color,” Betty would say, pointing to a painting or a throw pillow. “She always said it reminded her of something special.”
Peter would smile, understanding now that ‘something special’ had always been him.
He flew to Europe often, spending time with Mr. and Mrs. Felix and visiting Sally’s grave. Each trip was a bittersweet pilgrimage… joy and sorrow intertwined like delicate threads. During these moments, Betty would hold his hand, a silent support, and a living connection to the woman they both loved.
A grieving man in a cemetery | Source: Midjourney
“Tell me about how you met,” Betty would ask, and Peter would share stories of young love, promises made beneath school dance lights, and a connection that transcended time and distance.
On the anniversary of their first Christmas together, Peter and Betty stood by Sally’s grave. A bouquet of yellow roses lay on the stone, the petals bright against the pristine snow… a splash of color, hope, and remembered love.
“She used to say yellow is the color of new beginnings,” Betty whispered, her breath creating small clouds in the winter air.
A bouquet of yellow roses on a gravestone | Source: Midjourney
“Your mother was right. She’d be so proud of you,” Peter said, his protective arm around his daughter.
Betty nodded, leaning into his embrace. “And she’d be happy we found each other.”
Peter pressed a kiss to her temple, his heart heavy with loss and love. “I’ll never let you go,” he said again, the promise a covenant between a father, a daughter, and the memory of a love that had waited ten years to be reunited.
An emotional little girl smiling in a cemetery | Source: Midjourney
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
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