According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
Paris Jackson just turned 25, reveals what Michael Jackson was actually like as a father
Paris Jackson was born on April 3, 1998 in California, the second child of legendary musician Michael Jackson. Growing up in the shadow of the “King of Pop,” her life was anything but ordinary from the start. Her early years were a mix of privilege and isolation, shielded from the public eye by her father and siblings who valued privacy and a non-traditional education.
Paris and her brothers were homeschooled through sixth grade and were spared the relentless media scrutiny that dominated Michael Jackson’s life. Her father, deeply committed to a rich upbringing, exposed her to diverse cultures and experiences that went beyond the glare of fame. Paris fondly remembers how these experiences broadened her worldview and instilled in her values such as cultural appreciation and hard work. Even at a young age, she understood how important it is to be successful on your own.
At the age of 11, tragedy struck in Paris when her father suddenly passed away, thrusting her into the spotlight. Her poignant speech at his memorial service marked her public debut and gave the world a glimpse into Michael Jackson’s private family life. Paris and her brothers then accepted their father’s posthumous Lifetime Achievement Award at the Grammy Awards, further cementing their public presence.
Navigating her youth amid her father’s legacy proved to be a challenge. Paris faced personal problems that culminated in a period of change at a therapeutic boarding school in Utah. This experience was pivotal in improving her mental health and becoming a stronger person.
Despite the importance of her family name, Paris was determined to forge her own path. She graduated from high school and valued modeling as a means of self-expression, which helped her attract the attention of prestigious publications. Her unique style and individuality shined on the covers of Rolling Stone, Vogue and Narcisse, making her a fashion icon in her own right.
In 2020, Paris ventured into the music industry with her debut album “Wilted”, showcasing an indie-folk sound that explores themes of heartbreak and love. Although Paris is influenced by her father’s musical legacy, she is focused on developing her own identity in the industry.
Throughout her journey, Paris Jackson remains deeply connected to her father’s memory. She finds solace in dreams in which Michael Jackson continues to guide and comfort her, underscoring their enduring bond.
Paris Jackson’s story is one of resilience and growth, handling fame and personal loss with grace. She serves as an inspiration to those who face adversity and embodies the pursuit of individuality amid the challenges of her extraordinary upbringing.
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